ADHD and perfectionism is a toxic combo. I’ll spend hours on a task I could’ve done in 30 minutes because I’m afraid of it not being “good enough.” Anyone else get paralyzed by their own standards?

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Yes, not always paralyzed but never satisfied. I’ve recently been focusing on how often NT people do the things I stress endlessly to overcompensate and not do in an effort to reorient my expectations and standards i.e. sending email to wrong person or w grammar/spelling/factual error or attachment(s) left out, completely forgetting to do something, misreading emails or forms or directions, being late or totally missing meetings, etc. And while I have some resentment for people not living up to the pressure I put on myself, that’s a me-problem and I’m usually very understanding when other people screw up so I try to project that understanding and compassion on others. It helps me cope and it kind of calls their bluff in that they’re much less likely to double down and correct you that they’re not being understanding. Kind of like thanking someone for their patience vs apologizing for lateness.

I also try to keep in mind the 80/20 principle and do things in stages/batches, i.e. I try to do the bulk/what I can immediately and make a list of exceptions or things to follow up on after making a lot of progress vs sidetracking on individual items as they’re discovered and making little to no progress. I do rough outlines and drafts of reports/spreadsheets before I bother with any formatting/aesthetics.

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