Am I the only one who gets embarrassed reaching out to people you haven’t talked to in years just to ask about openings? I know networking helps, but it feels so unnatural. I’m worried I’ll come off as transactional. How do you reconnect without feeling cringe?

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I get it. But this is the kind of thinking you have to overcome to get ahead. You have to knock on a hundred doors, and be ok with having some of them slammed in your face. I struggle with this too.

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Happens all the time, no need to feel embarrassed. A senior attorney I barely know but am connected with on LinkedIn (we were both at the same firm like 6 years ago) just reached out to me about his wife looking for a VP/executive role in my industry. I told him I’d keep my eyes and ears open for her and if she had a role in mind at my company I’d see what I can do. That simple. I’ve gotten good jobs through my network as well, and always refer others (as long as they aren’t problematic). Many firms and companies offer referral bonuses too so the person might have a financial incentive to refer you.

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Why be embarrassed? It’s what a network is for.

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just ask, closed mouths don't get fed....

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I needed to hear this one ! You’re absolutely right.

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It's best not to let networking lapse, especially not for years. Ideally you develop a rapport with someone and check in with them now and then. It doesn't have to be anything serious, just keeping in contact is good. If you haven't been in touch with someone for years it will likely be awkward to call them up asking about a job lead.

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Ideally, it hasn’t been years since you last spoke. Good reason to catch up every once in a while. That said, it is awkward, but that’s how the world works.

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Honestly, they probably won’t remember and they’re probably not at the same company to even have access to the database for the notes of what you talked about.

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