Related Posts
Have you ever yelled at your coworker in public?
More Posts
Additional Posts in Advice, please!
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Have you ever yelled at your coworker in public?
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
Download the Fishbowl app to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Copy and paste embed code on your site

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

I would take the person out of the office for a coffee or something and have a human conversation. It sounds like something is wrong.
Ask if they are ok, happy etx. They may have something going on in their life causing this (ie, divorce, recent family death etx) OR there is something chemically imbalanced.
They may start to feel comfortable to talk if you let them know you are there to support but not sure how if you don’t better understand what’s going on.
Bottom line it’s not normal behavior so there’s something causing it ... you’ll get further if you have the convo then HR
This is definitely a grab a drink scenario. Lower the guard and find a casual atmosphere and ask directly.
I would talk to them directly instead of HR, perhaps they have performance anxiety because of a terrible former boss? Maybe they just need some human reassurance.
Definitely ask how they prefer to receive feedback, maybe there’s an easy communication adjustment that could make it easier for them to digest?
Get advice from HR in how to approach the conversation. They may not be right for this industry. Need a tougher skin.
Cont:
Even the simpliest of comments can cause them to cry. Thoughts if this should be directed to HR to manage? This seems beyond my and my team's control. Not sure if bringing this up to HR could cause more difficulties
Have had similar situation. What’s HR going to achieve - have a talk with them where they break down and then possibly become resentful and/or cry more. They need therapy or outside help and if HR will suggest that it could be helpful. Have a chat with HR first without mentioning any names. Other option is talk to employee directly - mention situation and ask how you can help, be empathetic. Don’t try to guide them towards anything, just hear what they have to say first. Perhaps it provides some insight.
My situation was quite similar. Possibly worse as the person would constantly backstab the team instead being accountable for themselves. They didn’t cry but internally also overconfident about their own capabilities.
Couple of things I’ve learned 1. Super hard for you to affect change if they can’t see it themselves 2. Through a series of questions you lead them to acknowledging some things I.e what happened today? How did it make you feel? Why did you feel that way? Do you think x person could have meant something else? If so how would you describe it?
The employee needs professional help but you telling them that can be a slippery slope. Also they aren’t being accountable so if you bring it up they will be resentful. They have to figure it out which could be painful for you.
Walking meetings can also help in situations like this too - less pressure than direct eye contact. Ask them how they like to receive feedback, how previous managers have managed that has been helpful and what has been not so helpful. Then as you establish a baseline, you can gently bring up that the emotional response and ask how you can help them - maybe they’ll say they feel attacked, and you can help have a frank conversation that their expectations are not where they need to be. Or maybe they’ll reveal they’re going through a lot of stress on the family front and you can share how therapy has really helped you/close friends going through similar challenges. Or maybe in establishing how they prefer to be managed, it will resolve itself bc their other needs will be met.
It’s so interesting to me — 10 years ago I feel like all of the answers here would be to let this person go, that they’re obviously not the right fit for the industry. While I think on one hand it’s good that we’ve started to care a bit more about each other’s mental health, I do kind of wish the industry approached things like it used to. If I had a junior who cried at feedback and was unable to handle it, I would suggest they find another job. Not trying to be cold but it doesn’t get any easier as you take on more responsibility and I don’t really think it’s any of our jobs to be someone’s therapist.