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You need a life outside of work and to be more proactive about doing other things — not just work + nothing. Also logging off early enough to do something meaningfully different before bed. Sometimes the mental noise won’t fully disappear, but I’ve found this helps
What do you have going on at home? A house full of toddlers will wipe out any opportunity to ruminate or reflect or ponder on anything at all!
Ohhhh I remember those days 🤣 We’re currently at 4, from 8 to 9mo.
2 under 2 is so challenging because both kids require so much individual attention!
Put the work phone away.
Can’t wait until I get an actual work phone. But the problem will be….they call the work phone first…no reply then the personal phone 🤬
I watch the Good Mythical Morning episode of the day on YouTube. …. I promise I am a real and actual serious lawyer otherwise 🤣
I stopped doing that by going in house. Seriously.
Just stop checking email after a certain time and rarely check it on weekends. As a litigator at least, this is very possible and quite nice
I don't do any work after I leave the office. I don't even think about work, I don't respond to work calls or texts, and I don't check my email. I really value work-life balance and that is the only way to actually have it.
Do you do a hobby instead? I do not check my emails after work either but my mind is still occupied by it I guess because I lack meaningful hobbies
What is your work schedule look like in office or remote?
Try to use the commute time as your down time to decompress
Do something you really like after work
Looking at watches
Rising Star
You need something that turns your brain off. I do certain chores once I’m done with work and the kids are down. Throw on headphones and just get into a zen. Sometimes it’s dishes, sometimes it’s plucking weeds. 2x/week it’s lifting heavy. When both mind and body are drained I conk out HARD.
What helped me the most was (1) gaining seniority and (2) having a kid. Once I got to midlevel, I started to understand deal flow and generally understand what would come next and use my working hours to anticipate things. And as said by others, once I had a kid, weekends are completely controlled/consumed/scheduled by my child; so I’ll check emails throughout the day and clock what needs to be done, but that work can only really happen after she sleeps at night.
It’s a curse of the legal field. Lol I bought myself a camper so I can enjoy life in stress free zones. lol
I have the same issue and I think what I said and I heard over and over, and I keep thinking about strategies and things to do (because I am so scared of making mistakes or forgetting) Writing down these thoughts and dialogues helped me the most. Although I have something meaningful after work or hobbies, unless I write things down and get them out of my system I kept rumination.
It can be anything. If I keep thinking about what I should do next and my to do list, I write “Need to follow up on contract, and then schedule a meeting so that I can expedite, then write an email to X for approval.”
If I keep thinking about conversations I had with coworkers and customers (maybe because the conversation was stressful or had confrontation, or maybe because I feel like I couldve done in a different manner), then I write “I said xyz but so and so said this and that and that made me feel bothered and frustrated. I could’ve said this and reacted in more professional manner, but I could’ve not. But that is okay because I learned new things and next time I can do differently (important not to bash myself but acknowledge what happened and try to be optimistic)”
If someone acted so mean and nasty way, I write colorful words just to get it out of my system too.