I’m a few years into corporate life and not finding it fulfilling. I told my boyfriend and he said he’d be willing to support me financially as long as I have some income of my own (ex. low-stress PT job). This would allow me more time and energy to pursue my hobbies and passions. I know it’d be a lifestyle adjustment but I’m tempted. Thoughts?

What does this mean for your retirement and investment accounts? Your savings growth? Your backup plan if your relationship becomes unhealthy? What will you do if he controls your spending or otherwise uses finances to control you? What happens if you break up and need housing urgently but it takes years to find a job that pays enough because you’ve had an extended career break “just because”? What happens if you get sick or go to the ER and need health insurance? What happens if you get seriously ill and need health insurance and he leaves you?

These are not rhetorical questions. Your proposal is very risky, even for a married woman but especially when you are simply dating and not at all legally obligated to each other.

Can you start a side hustle you’re passionate about? Can you scale back some responsibilities at work or move into a lower-demand role (but still full-time employed with your own income and benefits) to allow more time and mental energy for your hobbies or a passionate side hustle that could become your full-time job in a few years? Can you make space now to think about jobs that would excite your passions? No job is perfect, but there are jobs outside of corporate that are very rewarding and will keep you secure.

I think there are a few issues at play here - the first is protecting yourself. As a girlfriend, you have no protection. If you were my sister or daughter, I’d tell you to wait until you’re married.

The second - corporate jobs aren’t for everyone, and there are a few entrepreneurs in my family. What you’re missing is the perspective that most entrepreneurs hustle on their side business while full-time employed before quitting their corporate job. The only exception I’ve seen is people who are much further ahead in their careers and are able to quit with a ton of savings, and know they will be able to get their business up before their funds run out. My sister is grinding right now - she is working her full-time job while taking on side business to try to grow her own company so she can transition to doing that full-time.

Third - I would say that people have unreasonable expectations of work. It doesn’t need to be the most fulfilling part of your life; sometimes, the job is really the paycheck, and you find ways to make it enjoyable. I sometimes find that people I’ve mentored or managed in the past are expecting work to only be filled with things they enjoy - no one’s job is like that (not even entrepreneurs). There are going to be shitty parts of every job. The trick is to find ways to maximize the joyful and enjoyable parts of work, so that it can fund whatever you’re passionate about - family, hobbies, side hustle, etc.

Would you take a pt-low stress job if you were single or are you using your partner as a safety net?

I’m team make your own money and don’t depend on anyone else. You never know what can happen so always take care of yourself first and don’t rely on a partner.

And I second CD1 no one loves working but that’s life for you.

Obviously you are very young.

Depending on another person ONLY works while the relationship works... The opposite is: a rude awakening.

What would've your fallback strategy if the relationship ends?

What would be your “carrer” at that stage ?

Btw: NO ONE finds corporate life “fulfilling”.

Don’t do it. Independence and being able to support yourself are extremely valuable.

You also don’t want to make a decision so soon to cut your career short. Perhaps you’re in the wrong company or career, but I wouldn’t just go to a minimum effort job quite yet.

My biggest concern would be what happens in the event that his support is not available (due to a layoff, a breakup, he just changes his mind, etc.)

Could you support yourself with a different career path? If not, do you feel 100% confident that you could switch careers very quickly?

Corporate work isn't supposed to be fulfilling. It's supposed to give you money to pursue what you're passionate about outside of the 9-5.

Trying to pursue hobbies and passions as income will turn those into things you no longer enjoy. Additionally, it's very hard to make decent income off side hustles or hobbies and that grind takes up way more time than a 9-5 does.

You sound young and naive, and I think you need to really talk with your boyfriend to understand what this looks like. Does "some income" mean a certain amount of money? What happens if he expects "some income" to be $1-2K/month and you're only making $500? Is the expectation that you work PT and do more chores?

I'd also watch out for resentment because I've been in this scenario and it's really easy to say "sure, I'll support you, I want you to be happy!" but when the time goes by and you're the one doing the grind to support two people so one can pursue hobbies and you can't..... it doesn't end well.

If you have the privilege to be in this situation, go ahead and make sure you know exactly what you're getting into. But also be prepared to learn that this might not end the way you think.

Unless your married to that man I wouldn’t do it a man can walk away from you at anytime. If you don’t find fulfillment it’s okay means start looking else where.

So I don’t know if it’s rude to say but you said your bf. He is not your fiancé or husband right? A bf could leave you anytime so unless you are married don’t do it.

Im in the position your boyfriend is in with my boyfriend. He’s been burnt out and totally not having time to live life. I work in a corporate role making pretty good money so I told him that as long as some type of income is coming in, I’m happy to support a majority of our financial needs. Although, Working less means I expect more assistance around the house. I think it’s a great idea as long as you both are on the same page and you have a plan should 💩 hit the fan (I.e a layoff, increased bills, etc.).

My only and biggest worry is that this might naturally change the power dynamic between you and your boyfriend. And your boyfriend might be underestimating what he’s putting himself against too (now that he’s the main provider for two of you, his responsibility and risk appetite would change for sure). I would say maybe test it for a short period of time and see how things go and then decide if it’s the right way.

Not many people find corporate work life fulfilling. Remember, it's called "work", not "fun." Focus on finding fulfillment outside work hours.

But more power to you if you want to cut back on your time working with the financial support of your boyfriend. If it were me, I'd wait til he put a ring on it before reducing my own earning potential.

You've clearly already made up your mind and just want people to agree with you, but... it's a hard no for me. First, as a child of divorced parents with a father who didn't pay child support despite making far more than my mom who worked 2-3 jobs (that she definitely didn't WANT to be doing) just to support us, I never want to be financially dependent on someone else.

Others have already said this, but what happens if your boyfriend loses his job, or breaks up with you? Even if you feel secure with , things can happen. A friend became a stay-at-home mom when she had her first child, and then her husband died suddenly. Because they had given up her income they had almost no savings, so in this midst of grieving and helping her children work through their grief she was also packing up their home to move in with her parents across the country. And you're not even married, so unless he makes you a beneficiary you have no legal right to his assets if he dies.

Most of us don't truly WANT to work, but I guarantee you can find something that brings in enough income and is also enjoyable enough. It's not corporate or nothing - non-profit is low pay but can be very fulfilling. Or you can get a job in a store where you go in and do your work but aren't thinking about it after hours and are able to use that energy to focus on your personal hobbies for fulfillment!

At best you come across as naive, at worst entitled and lazy.

My pov after several layoffs and periods when my husband was supporting me: jobs are first and foremost for money, not personal fulfillment or enjoyment. Depending on one partner for income puts them in a more powerful and stressful position. What if something happens and they lose their job or ability to work? You have less flexibility to pursue hobbies, traveling, etc. that may fulfill you outside work and cost money. You hurt your own retirement prospects by contributing less, meaning less builds up over time. You have more limited health insurance options, and cheaper plans could result in higher actual expenses (I learned this the hard way). Plus if you get married and have kids, you have less justification for maintaining a PT job or expensive hobby given the cost of child care.

Most importantly: If you are not married, you have no legal claim to any of your partner’s money. If they surprise you with a breakup, you will need to figure out how to support yourself entirely on more limited earnings get back into a higher-earning job (which can be a challenge).

What has helped me is emotionally disconnecting from work, not expecting it to be anything more than my income source, and pursuing hobbies that make me happy. It took me years and several very hard experiences to get to this point, but I am in a much better position mentally and financially.

few people find corporate life fulfilling. Your better bet is to look for a career job at a different company. Not all corporate cultures are the same. Do *not* become financially dependent on a boyfriend. Keep job hopping until you find the right fit.

By your replies to the advice you asked for, it seems that you had already made up your mind about this situation. It's your life, do whatever you want and enjoy it!

We spend more time at work than anywhere else. Love or at least like what you do or quit. Things that you buy with your money are just things. They will come and go. Your joy and happiness is always there you just have to allow yourself to take the risk to achieve them.
I’m not stupid and say leave without a plan but working for money alone is dumb.