I’m going through it and just need to vent. I have spent over $25K (think millions in my local currency) over the past few years on my father’s different business ventures - all to no avail. He chucks these losses to ‘challenges of doing business in Africa’ and is upset that I have refused to fund him any more. I send monthly upkeep and take care of huge expenses. I recently got promoted and I don’t feel comfortable sharing the news for the fear of being billed even more. I’m tired!

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At some point. You’ll have to stop spending money on his ventures. But I wish you luck because that’s not the easiest convo to have

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Absolutely keep your salary and new income news away from him. As much as we want to help you have to focus on yourself I took out so many loans on behalf of my dad and am still paying them back myself which has increase my monthly expense by $1000 when I could be using that money for home savings.

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I hear you all and believe me, I have tried to set the boundaries and he pretends to understand for a while but then comes up with another bright idea 😔

I have my own kids and I hope I can’t even imagine putting them in this situation.

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Yikes. I have to hug my dad a little tighter next time. He is about to be 70 and still getting degrees and fending for himself. Some of our black parents need to do better.

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Good luck with that. I am Haitian and I have had past incidents where family members felt entitled to my earnings. It is definitely a tough spot to be in. But you have to say no and set your boundaries.

Girl I feel the struggle as an immigrant child setting money boundaries with our parents now hard and something I struggle with but you have to put yourself first and let him know that constantly sending him money for this has been really hurting /draining you

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