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Bowl Leader
Hello guys
Please help me get 11 likes.
Chief
Incoming multi-tier cringe
Bowl Leader
Where them 30+ ladies at? 25M 🙋♂️😉
Visual Storyteller
Ahh.. how I miss the good ol’ days.
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You’re not alone—so many of us tie our value to performance because the system rewards nothing else. Therapy’s a huge first step. Rebuilding that identity takes time, but it starts with making space for things that bring you joy outside the job.
Some ppl don’t have Jesus in their lives and it shows
If you seek Jesus and have an ongoing relationship, truly I tell you, this is not the case, AA2. Lol
Rising Star
Good for you for working through this in therapy. I was a workaholic M&A attorney and after I started working on these character flaws I started to make serious changes in my life. Ultimately I ended up in house with incredible WLB, quit drinking, found God, and am now developing who I want to be as a man outside of as an employee or lawyer.
Being a lawyer is part of it, but I now have a lot more going for me and people respect that a lot more than just my ability to churn out billables. I’m still working on it in therapy though and it’s an ongoing practice. Proud of you for doing the work. Good luck.
Getting sober was huge for me too. Not only for the competitive edge, but so I could enjoy time off rather thzn just numbing it out. Congrats on your sobriety!
Being a lawyer has the tendency to make humans very boring. It works its way into every crevice. You stop making plans because you are tired of breaking them. You need to very intentional about finding things that you love outside of the firm so that you will make time bc you love/want/need it so much.
Yeah 4 years of therapy fundamentally changed my relationship to the job and it's been great
Pro
One perspective I’m stumbling across is that the constant themes of who I am show up in my practice as much as as outside of it. So while I’m certainly a boss, lawyer and partner, I am also a teacher, mentor, leader, friend, confidant and adviser. For those of us who never had tons of hobbies, or ones that translated easily given the time constraints of practice, I’ve found that leaning in to opportunities where I get to use one of these descriptors is typically more fulfilling for me than trying the latest hobby fad.
Well, I assume you had an identity before you became a lawyer. So that’s a good starting point to build from to start the rebuild. Hobbies, interests, friendships before law school/lawyer?
Oh weird, I just realized that I no longer do anything outside of work that I used to do. I have no identity. Fuck
This is less “practical” advice and it takes time to figure out how it works in your life. It will be very specific to you. You are a human being. You are not a human doing. I hope you find yourself.
It's going to be a long process a few years for sure
You would have to quit your job to find who you truly are
What are your passions? Have you traveled around the globe ? -if not do it .You will discover quickly what you were missing and that no job is more important than your own health, family and those who love you truly ( animal pets)
As you can see you already started paying your therapist to gain your mental health in balance if that is not going to help you,your employer will replace you with a speed of light
You need to balance your life,your passions with your work bc this is something you don't have at the moment
Read " The monk who sold his Ferrari" by Robin S Sharma,read The last lecture by Randy Push,read " The Go- Giver by Bob Burg and John David Manna and " The Top Five Regrets of the Dying" by Bronnie Ware and then message me or see your therapist
Good luck !