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Someone once said that a career is not a life sentence and I always found that to be very wise. You grow and change over time and if law isn’t fulfilling anymore and you’re miserable, give yourself permission to find something that brings you joy.
Just my opinion but the miserable people (not just lawyers, but a lot of us) I see struggle with perfectionism/people pleasing/insecurity/time management/general mental health issues that could be handled through therapy and getting priorities in order. Me personally I try not to tie my happiness to work, meditate and do lots of self care activities and it helps.
Before you find your next role, take a long vacation. Like a month at least and do something you’ve wanted to do. Shake off the stress and sadness so they don’t follow you into your new role
I feel the same way
It’s a game you can’t win.
Even if you write the best, bill the most, play perfect political game, by the end, it’s still other people’s game. You just can’t win when they make the decision.
Lateral. Miserableness is not a job requirement, even if it predominates private practice. Believe it or not, there are actual firms in existence where people are happy and can balance their personal lives.
I thought such firms only existed in my dreams. Do tell!
Make your own job
I have 40 years of experience in law including with law firms, my own office and in government. I am sorry to say that all of them were inordinately stressful one way or another. My own office was designed to be beneficial for causes I believed in so I deliberately realized less income that way. Call me a fool. The treatment I received by most law firms I worked for certainly supports the comments of attorneys here that the life of an attorney is miserable at best. The cruelty is what I found inexplicable. The government job had the most potential for satisfaction until it didn’t. Maybe I should have stayed in the job I had as an undergraduate in college with the Post Office. Or, maybe I really did a service to others ( including, needless to say, my family.)
Try four decades. Everyone I started with is dead, practicing but miserable, or on their way out.
I did four year law school in a foreign country. Then ten years practice there. Then one year in U.S. law school. Then four years practice in the U.S. so far.
My mates are still alive (Which is very IMPORTANT!)
But not easy for sure. Unless they were born with family trust funds
Government. I thought I wanted to leave the profession, then got a job (my current one) where I thought I’d be able to “check out” mentally for a while. But then I found my passion again and I’m more happy at work than I’ve ever been.
Local bar associations or Inns of Court. Is there a law school in your city or nearby you could volunteer/teach at? Your college and law school might have alumni groups in your city that gather for happy hours/events. If they don't, consider starting one. Or if you're open to remote jobs, search for those online or thru LinkedIn. Sounds like some people on this app have had luck with recruiters too. While figuring out the job situation, volunteering for a cause that's important to you may be worthwhile. Connecting with others has helped me survive times that have felt hopeless
This is my 3rd or 4th career. If anyone asks for advice about going to law school and they are still in undergrad, I suggest doing something else first. I feel a lot of people go into law because they have an inaccurate view of actual practice, I did, or they don’t have an idea of where to go after undergrad, I think having previously life experience gave me a leg up in law school because I wasn’t concerned about what not being a lawyer meant and there was not a blow to my ego if it didn’t work out. I feel a lot of law students and practicing attorneys make being a lawyer a personality trait and while it is to some extent there are plenty of other ways to make money.
I just went solo and it comes with a whole host of other stressors but being the master of my own destiny has helped immensely. As others have said, I took an extended break and just did nothing before taking the solo jump after my last job. Take some time to reflect on yourself and just let your body reset because even as a government lawyer this is a high stress job. I have mainly practiced criminal defense and can attest second hand trauma is real. I know despite my attempts to the contrary I do get invested in my cases because I’d argue most lawyers do to be a zealous advocate.
While i do enjoy practicing law, I do sometimes think that there has to be something else with more balance. There is no shame in doing something different and in the long term it may be better and more lucrative for you. I wish you the best of luck in finding a better fit either practicing law or in another endeavor.
Maybe try a totally different area of law such as Mark Elias firm or the Southern Poverty Law Center?
Start your own business! Or do part time legal work. I do both. I am also getting licensed to become a health and wellness coach, which is connected to my business. :)
How much do you have saved up?
I feel u. Sometimes I wonder if I’d like any job though or at least a job that pays well.
Follow your passion
Get into Vortex
No matter what - think positive
Practice gratitude
Use your imagination to create your future profession
Human brain doesn't know the difference between what is real and what is imaginary
Practice daily
Good luck