Motherhood is incompatible with working in advertising: change my mind.
If I think of any mom who’s excelling inside an ad agency, she either has a nanny at home or her partner has a gentler job. Let’s also talk about how a large chunk of layoffs (US and UK) or people are leaving the industry are mothers.

likehelpful
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It’s hard, no doubt. But saying it’s impossible is naive, too. I know CDs, ECDs, and CCOs that are high performers and amazing moms.

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Hey I’m saying that generally there is an incompatibility and that’s why both the gender pay gap is still so high and many senior women are just exiting the industry altogether. I also know of a handful of incredible senior women with glittering careers and children and I’m really happy for them. They are role models! But I fear that they are very much the exception and not the rule.

Anecdotally too, I’ve lost count of the amount of women that have exited the industry. They were always the ones put up for layoff, always the ones overlooked for that big project, always the ones having to hide their status as a parent in the workplace. It’s such a crying shame that the industry allows itself a leaky bucket of talent.

I empathize with all moms (dads too) in our industry because it can be extremely difficult and stressful. Even with the best help from family or a nanny, you’ll never get those years back with your kids. I struggled with this a lot when my kids were young. I loved my job, but the travel, stress, and working crazy hours was too much. I would see my kids early before school, and then many nights only have an hour with them before bedtime. Mentally I had nothing left for them or my husband. It was overwhelming, and I was always sad to not be more involved. Ultimately I left advertising and went on the client side for 10 years. Best decision! No more travel, actual work life balance, time for my family, and no more guilt of missing out. Never had to take a step back in title or earnings. Now that our kids are in college, guess what, I’ve been back in advertising for four years. It’s great again and much more compatible with my stage in life.

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You’re lucky if you have that experience client side. My client side experience has topped the agency chaos unfortunately. It’s rare to backfill in this economy when someone leaves. It doesn’t matter if it’s a designer or developer, better brush up on your creative suite and html.

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This is a brutal industry for parents. I think it’s obvious that’s what OP meant to convey. And I’m a little confused by the pushback from SD1 and AD1 but maybe I’m missing something.

likesmarthelpful

I don’t think I’ll get over how serious people take making ads. Like I can’t imagine saying to a mom, “I need you to stay late to get the El Poco Loco “crazy sunday deals” social posts out on time.”

likefunny

Lol yeah planners always act like it’s life or death if we don’t get something live right away

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The wildest thing about all of this is that it doesn’t have to be this way.

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Dabbling job and raising kids has historically been a challenging task and generations have done it. No matter which era or industry or economies you live in.

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I’m sorry but no, there’s nothing wrong with pointing out that a job with long, unpredictable hours is uniquely challenging for parents. Are there other industries with similar issues? Of course. But minimizing advertising’s difficulties shows, at best, an ignorance to what parents face, and at worst, hostility.

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Happy to chat with you 1:1, but we make it work. My husband has an incredibly demanding job, so I am the default parent and responsible for any calls from school, pick up, drop off, doctors appointments, travel sports. I have been upfront with that once an offer has been presented.

I work outside of traditional hours, but I do truly love it. Please DM me if you need to chat.

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You’re creatives! Create it the way u want it!

For me, I decided rising all the way to the top wasn’t compatible with how I wanted to raise my kids and be present but middle management and being clear about what was important to me worked. I also think it’s hugely important to show junior staff it’s possible. Depends on the account, the team, the bosses but I’ve seen an evolution. Also important that once clients have your trust you say “I can’t make the 5pm meeting because I’m at soccer” or “I have to drop my son at a friends at 2:30, can we do 2:45”

And most life changing was flexible work. I’m usually in office 2x and home the rest.

likehelpful

Having a life is incompatible with working in advertising

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But not fatherhood.

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To be fair I don’t think anybody is ever surprised or in disagreement with the idea that being a mom and having a career are endlessly at odds with each other.

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It’s certainly not easy. “Incompatible” is a relative term. Yeah, I know a few people excelling inside an agency, but that doesn’t mean it has been easy. A lot of us just don’t have the luxury of having a choice.
When my wife (a creative also) returned to work from her maternity leave, while we were scrambling to find daycare (nobody told us there were waiting lists that were years long), she was laid off two weeks in. I was working freelance and suddenly we had a kid and no medical insurance. Fortunately on the financial side, I was busy AF at the time, but I was working 80 hours a week. We have no family nearby (we’re immigrants) so my wife was taking care of our baby all by herself. I’d get home at midnight sometimes and do a dream feed. That was the only time I was having with my kid. It was brutal. Later I got a FT job with more manageable hours and benefits but less pay. My wife decided she wanted to stay home with our kid for the first couple years. We had to make it work with one income. It was tight but doable. She went back to work when our kid was about 3 years old. But we had to move for her job. I started to look for work in the new city, and then the pandemic hit and fucked everything up. I couldn’t find work and we decided to hold off on kindergarten. I became a SAHD for the next 2 years while she worked. I spent all day, everyday with my kid. Some parts about it were great and I’m glad I had so much time with him. But it also almost drove me insane. When things picked up again, then I also got a FT job again. But we’ve had to switch off roles a few times to make it work. Yeah, this industry isn’t friendly to parents at all. Not fathers and definitely not mothers. And while it can be done, it sure as fuck should be easier than it is.

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I’d argue this has more to do with the country’s stupid aversion to social safety nets and protecting workers, than it does with the industry itself. People in the ad industry in Europe for example, don’t see the insane continual rounds of layoffs you see here. And people get lots of maternity and paternity leave, free daycare. A hell of a lot more vacation time. Health insurance regardless of employment status. All of those things are far more compatible with families than what we have here.

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You seem accusatory and aggressive toward moms rather than toward the industry that needs to change.

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Try fashion! It’s even worse.

Don’t worry. 12 months from now we’re ALL going to be home with our kids trying to find work. Beginning in in 5 months with thousands of refugees from the OMNI/IPG takeover… and then the recession caused by Trumps ridiculously dumb tariffs.

likesmart

What a jarring thing to read as a 1st time solo mom here...I'm doing just fine, and fortunate to have my connects keep me employed. I don't need to convince anyone of anything!

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OP, are you a woman *and* a mother *and* excelling in advertising? If not, I don’t think we need to change your mind… I think you kinda need to do that yourself.

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Carers too! Just like mothers we are also in the same situation

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Publicis “Global Chief Solutions Architect,” Scott Hagedorn, blithely offered the following advice during an all-hands to folks who had moved out of NYC during COVID and were now struggling with RTO mandates: “Do as I do. Just take an apartment in the city and stay there three days a week. I don’t see my kids for days at a time.”

Incomparable is a strong word to use here

Incompatible*

some of us dont have husbands, partners or family help either (mostly for those in the comments saying "my partner helps in xyz way"

It’s possible but you have to set firm boundaries and be very good at what you do.

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