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18 months in for parenting or at work? And performance at home with kid or at work?
Same is it with kid or work?
Introvert here as well. I’m about 10 months in the job and liking the pay, but starting to feel the drain of being something I’m not. Don’t really like talking much but love my kids too much to quit without something else lined up. Gotta find what my calling is.
Wish I could say it gets better soon, but just today my 3 and 5 year old had me drained with "Daddy are you watching?" While they were riding bikes and I was trying to get yard work done.
I'm sure a turning point happens when they don't crave mom and dad as much (and I'll miss these times), but it hasn't happened yet at 5 years old
Sorry, to clarify I have an 18 month old, and what’s beginning to exhaust is the performative dadding
Love him, love my life, but there’s just no recharge
I deal with the same thing sometimes. Try to schedule time to do something for you - gym, nap, anything. It’ll help you be a better dad. Get a babysitter if you need. Frame it as increasing quality of parenting… 90% time x 100% quality is better than 100% fine at 50% quality
Stop performing. Just be you.
I get energy from being around people (esp my kids), but I also need my solitude time. Both my kids are very young and as I’m divorced, I only get certain time to focus on them. It’s harder to try and make every bit of that time feel like it’s solely for them. They started to notice the toll it takes; even at the ages of 4 and 5. I started focusing on just being me with them around, and they see a less stressed and overall happier dad to have around. Everyday life doesn’t have to change. So I take them on my errands or give them things to do by themselves while I prep food or even simply sip coffee in peace. I don’t neglect them, and I’m always available or thinking about their needs. But you don’t have to be “on” all the time either. It’s empowering for them in the end to understand the world doesn’t revolve around them as well as see a father figure who separates their time.
You got this, big daddy
Take a nap every afternoon or evening for at least 1-2 hours, it makes a difference