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I'm so sorry you were experiencing this - I hope it has gotten better since you posted. If it hasn't, you might want to speak to your doctor about it
There will be a time when kids will be engaged and do not need much time from you and there will come a time when you will enjoy work. Hang in there. Parenting is hard and can make it feel like all other things in life are meaningless. If your employer is accommodating, talk to them about flexibility around time and spend quality time with kids