{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Gearing up to burn the rest of my paternity leave (11 weeks). SM on my project thinks that’s too long to take since there’s a lot of work in our pipeline and I should consider only using half of it...", "post_id": "5ab13d16960b1f0014c40ff5", "reply_count": 27, "vote_count": 0, "bowl_id": "599aea2d2a4d83001641590b", "bowl_name": "Consulting Dads", "feed_type": "bowl" }

Gearing up to burn the rest of my paternity leave (11 weeks). SM on my project thinks that’s too long to take since there’s a lot of work in our pipeline and I should consider only using half of it...

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Take full 11 weeks - it’s a benefit for a reason - you will never regret taking it - shame on the SM!

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Totally justified. Take it and don’t feel guilty. Shame on your SM

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Take it

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Look your SM is thinking of themselve first - their project, how to back fill, potential impacts to them if things go sideways because you’re out. Is NOT thinking of you as a person, what’s right or what’s best for you. Don’t short change your kid - take the time

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Take it. Even if it means needing to find a new project when you come back, it's worth it.

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There will always be more work in the pipeline. That’s the thing about work, it never ends. On the other hand your kid will only be young once. Take every minute of leave you can and don’t feel guilty for an instant!

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Take and it tell the SM to get fucked. This is a hard-won benefit that many of us didn’t get. I have three kids and took a week or two of PTO for each. I didn’t suck it up that hard just for the new crops of dads to be guilted into giving it up.

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I used 5 weeks when baby was born, now want to take the remaining 11. Partner approved (didn’t seem thrilled) and now SM is also telling me that 11 weeks seems like a long time to take off, especially since our group is very busy and lots of work coming up. Guess I’m just looking for support from you other dads that I’m justified in taking the 11 weeks and shouldn’t feel guilty

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Tell the SM to suck it. Family first.

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Absolutely take it. Your leave is part of your compensation package. You wouldn’t give up any of your compensation in the form of salary or bonus to sacrifice for the practice would you?

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The policy is the policy. That’s why the partner approved it. The one Hong I would caution is, how much notice are you giving and should you have proactively planned that you were going to use the time further out? That being said, I would still take the time if it is available

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I gave 5 weeks notice. So plenty of time.

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There will always be other projects but you’ll never get this time back with your child and wife

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You work this hard to be able to enjoy life. This is one of the best parts of life. Forget the project, progression, and all that for a minute and ask yourself what really matters. I think you’ll know the answer in a second

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Take it and you won't regret it one bit...took 15 wks (paternity plus pto) for my little one and was without a doubt the best decision

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They could have given you half of the paternity leave to start with...but they didn’t so you’re cool!

Basically telling me that I should consider taking just 6-8 weeks and come back after that. Would mean I’m basically leaving all weeks I don’t take on the table since it’s coming up on a year since baby was born. I might be able to come back and do non-travel (or at least limited) work but not sure it’s a good move to leave the amazing benefit of paternity leave unused..

For what it’s worth, SM does not have kids.

That’s the feeling I got too P1. I’ve been with him since October on 2 different projects and he’s had the ability to be very hands off for both projects since I can manage without him being too involved...seems like he’s just trying to continue using me to make his life easier.

TBH the SM is saying that now but realize that Deloitte or consulting in general is revolving door. Sorry but one week out and they can replace you and two weeks out they’ll barely remember you. Take your full leave. Your baby, your wife, your self will be grateful. And no one is irreplaceable that they can’t staff someone else in your role

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