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Welcome to adult Life?
Find joy in little things that drive you; everyone is a little different.
For me, i love the fact that I work with smart, funny and caring people. I would put my teams against anyone in the world and am confident they will come out on top. It makes me feel smarter and I enjoy knowing I have helped them along they way.
I enjoy the financial independence and lifestyle this job has allowed me to achieve. I can take care of my parents who have lived on just a few hundred dollars a month most of their lives, help pay for my brothers study abroad, take my kid on a plane on a nice vacation and show her the world, help my community and support causes I feel passionate about.
I love the fast pace and challenges and adjustments that are required. I get bored easily and this career has allowed me to do many different things, try many different roles, work for some amazing brands and push myself. I enjoy everything I have accomplished on my own, with my teams, with the firms I’ve been with. There are only maybe what a couple of million in the world that do what we do; in my field, probably about 10,000 people and my firm, teams and I are on top of that - it’s good to know you’re one of the best.
We all are a sarcastic bunch with a self-deprecating sense of humor who get desensitized by the complexity and challenges of this career and the opportunities it provides. Many of us are drivers who are rarely satisfied with just being in the same spot. Take a deep breath, take a step back and realize what you have accomplished as compared to an average human being. Think of all the hardships you have gone through. Give yourself a pat in the back. Be kind to yourself and others. Appreciate fruits of your labor and find ways to do things you enjoy and have fun!
Great reply, I love it. May I ask which firm do you work for? I need a mentor who can help me boost my confident
Honestly, it’s about changing your mindset.
I’ve found that if you take a vacation all to yourself to analyze your long-term goals and work backwards, you can then build milestones to go for.
When you are in a rut, of this job is a part of that overall end goal (can be retirement, a dream job, whatever), that drive to do it is what gets you going
Very helpful PwC1:)
Change one word ... change the word have to the word get. Instead of I have to take these meeting minutes to hey I get to take meeting minutes. It sounds dumb I know. It takes mental adjustment and you won’t feel it at first. Try it for 21 days and tell me how you feel about your job then.
I can totally get on board with choosing how to see things—could be from my time with Buddhist monks in temples in the mountains of South Korea.
I’m trying to raise a point about not being manipulated. Some things are harmful and sometimes people try to convince victims that they’re not really being harmed and should just be happy. I’ve worked closely with cult survivors and the “power of positive thinking” can essentially be weaponised.
Feeling uncomfortable is a signal to seek change; it’s one of the things that make humans so great. I think it’s very important to listen to these kinds of feelings because they could be a much-needed warning. If you’re unhappy with something, look for ways to improve it. If it’s outside of your control and not harmful, then I would recommend not focusing on it. I can understand wanting to go so far as to convince oneself that it’s actually enjoyable, but I would prefer not focusing on it and keeping an open mind to solutions and alternatives—guess that’s where the difference of philosophy comes in.
I think our divergence is less of eastern dualism vs western non-contrarianism (where we seem to agree) but more regarding stable Confucius relationships vs western progressivism / innovationism / disruptionism.
Suck it up, Buttercup!
I bet you’re a real leader, M1. Nothing like the rest of the frauds that don’t know anything 🙄.
Find a job you like to do
Hey man I think it’s probably you are not aligned to the right project or you may simply be a victim of a toxic environment. If you are not doing well, talk to your SM and let him know your concerns before it’s too late also bring it up with your counselor and seek advice. Once you roll off, take two weeks vacation. Go somewhere warm and just enjoy yourself. Turn off laptop and phones. Before you go on a vacation tap on your network and let them know you are looking for work (copy paste same email too 20-30 managers/SM/ partners). Let them know you are available and looking for a work and also offer your help for firm initiative and ask them if it’s okay to set up 15 min on their calendar to chat. When you are back from vacation go aggressive on network and look for project that you are comfortable with. Also find a mentor who you can talk to like a friend and seek advice. Sometimes we know the next steps but we just don’t do it or we wait for someone to tell us, hey can you do that. The mentor would point that out for you. When you come home from work put your work phone airplane mode and let your team know you don’t check your work phone after 9 because you go to sleep early etc... take control of your life. Nothing is difficult it just how we do things. Have gone through same thing so I can relate and feel your pain. Now go sleep and use your points to fly somewhere this weekend. Good night
Same boat for 5 years. I think I need a new job
Tbh, I think you probably need a new job. I know because I’m in the same boat. I think that when we’re “waiting for the week to end” it’s clear that there’s a misalignment with our personal values and our work.
I’m doing my best to stay positive about it all. But, I’m also looking for a new job in my free time. Best of luck 🙏🏾
For me the epiphany came when I was honest with myself and was able to acknowledge that doing what I loved wouldn’t provide the same financial benefits and I made the conscious choice that I like what I did enough to keep doing it so that I could live the life I wanted. The trade off would have been a job I loved without having the money for the life I wanted. It was the right choice for me but you need to be honest with yourself
Thats why you shouldn't look for a job. Look for something that you love and go make money doing it.
“If you are working for the weekend, your s*^t’s broken"
Same here !!!!! Been feeling this way for like over a year. It’s okay cause every other Friday is payday
If that is how your company / colleagues live respect, I would suggest leaving (right away). Criticism is great, but this sounds more like mobbing.
I love travelling for work. I dread local clients due to traffic. So I actually dont look forward to the week but I dont dread it. I'm more just neutral about my days.
I also find the separation of work days and play days very refreshing. During the work week I dont think about video games and during video game days I don't think about work.
Find a new crew or line of work. The people can really make a huge difference, if the work isn't something you want to change.
Other than that, just get older, then a week will feel like nothing. </depressing comment>
Have you considered career coaching? It’s a great way to structure your thinking on your goals, what fulfills you, and your own growth.
Here’s a directory of certified coaches through Northwestern University. Most will work with you virtually. (Full disclosure: this was my graduate program.) If you want to find someone local, I’d suggest seeing which universities have reputable certifications and working from there. There are a lot of snake oil salesmen in this area just FYI.
https://www.sesp.northwestern.edu/masters-learning-and-organizational-change/masters-learning-and-organizational-change-directory-of-coaches.html
Man’s search for meaning by Viktor Frankl
How often do people say you suck at work? Competent feedback is usually more specific and measurable than that, so I'm guessing you're either in a toxic environment (leave) or you're in a toxic mindset (give yourself credit more often).
Rarely. If someone does by any chance, I remember it for so long and never make that mistake again.
I absolutely believe that you have to be in a learning mindset. If you’re learning something new, and it motivates you, you will never feel like this. If you’re not doing something that at your core pleases you, you will be miserable. I know it’s a cliche and easier said that done, but if you’re under 30, just quit and find something else, and do that 3-4 times till you find something you like.
Go and do three years deployment in some shithole in Afghanistan, and then another two years on an oil rig in the north sea.
I thank god everyday for getting my MBA and getting the hell out of there. Air conditioned office, conference calls, some Excel work - heaven!
TL;DR - get some perspective