{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "I was at a virtual happy hour and an older coworker was telling a story about when he was playing a pro am poker tournament and his friend w him said ‘don’t be a p*ussy’ so he’d bet more, that was the story. There were 10 people on the zoom and no one called him out for telling an inappropriate story. I wish I did but I froze. What should I have said? And why did he think it was OK to share a story like that?", "post_id": "61ec14d5b6c388003303c877", "reply_count": 79, "vote_count": 12, "bowl_id": "5e8656b80bdab1002a7355dc", "bowl_name": "Confession ", "feed_type": "bowl" }

I was at a virtual happy hour and an older coworker was telling a story about when he was playing a pro am poker tournament and his friend w him said ‘don’t be a p*ussy’ so he’d bet more, that was the story. There were 10 people on the zoom and no one called him out for telling an inappropriate story. I wish I did but I froze. What should I have said? And why did he think it was OK to share a story like that?

funnylike
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I’m with the OP. The story is clearly inappropriate to tell to a group. It’s half-baked and wasted everyone’s time. Nobody should tell stories that don’t go anywhere. Sure the hook is there, but where’s the action? The followup? And what’s the takeaway? Did the coworker bet more and did either the comment or subsequent betting cause more tension in the friendship? Did they win or were they cleaned out by the pro because of the advice? Was this a cautionary tale to stick to your guns or some rallying cry to be bold in the face of uncertainty?

likehelpfulfunny

All of the people attacking OP for being too sensitive, I don't get how you can reconcile that. Would you say to a client, female or male, don't be a p****, just sign the engagement letter? Would you say it to your parents or your spouse? I don't think you would because you know it is insensitive, hurtful, demeaning? Why should a junior colleague have to "toughen up" and listen to derogatory language? They aren't friends. This is a work event. If you believe that language is business appropriate, prove it by using it in your emails. Or instead of putting your pronouns in your signature box, go ahead and put "not a p****"

likefunnyhelpful

My esteemed colleagues, I believe you have misread my comments and thou hath doth taken too great offense at my modest comments. Firstly, I clearly do not subscribe to any version of "p bomb" that is ludicrous. I have clearly said the appropriate term, which is droppin the p money. Respect. I did reference the f bomb, as that was a direct comparison and quote to a comment in this thread. Respect. Secondly, I do make it a point to take all my etiquette advice from media planners. Respect. U cun not have been more helpful. Respect.

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This is a prime example of why I’d rather keep my personal life away from work. People say they want to get to know their co-workers, but as soon as they share something about themselves those same co-workers look for reasons to be the accountability savior. Not every comment you find mildly inappropriate or disapprove of requires you to voice your disapproval or report the person

likesmartfunny

True D2.

Toughen up

likesmarthelpfulfunny

Let people be happy and share Jeez 🙄

likesmarthelpful

I’m sorry this happened to you. All the people laughing or saying to just deal with it are exactly the people that enable a toxic work environment. A work related happy hour is very different than just hanging at a bar with your friends. The people that think this type of behavior is okay are the ones that zone out during the annual training and make for terrible leaders. It was inappropriate, and it’s the type of thing that will get you in trouble with HR. No matter the other responses here - your feelings are valid .

likefunnyhelpfulsmart

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

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It’s inspiring to see so many people dunking on OP

likeupliftingsmartfunny

#wokesquad

Sounds like OP needs a virtual “safe space” to hangout at during these happy hours

likefunny

I stopped reading at “virtual happy hour” 😒

funnylike

That is the true crime. Agree w you. Nothing good can follow from that.

likesmart

Don’t do virtual happy hour 🍻

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If there was an awkward silence right after, he is embarrassed enough to not be punished further, I assure you.

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How is it an inappropriate story? This is why people are afraid to be normal at work. Because people are so sensitive about everything.

likesmart

Would you use this language in a client meeting? Put it in a SOW? It’s just basic professionalism.

likefunny

This cancel culture will be the end of us!

like

This is why no one wants to be friendly with their coworkers. Don’t even go if you are looking to be offended by everything

like

Which part of the story was inappropriate for you? The playing poker / gambling or the P word? Asking bc I am more bothered by gambling than swearing so just trying to understand context.

like

Lol EP… do ‘t be a p***

likefunnyupliftingsmart

You think it is inappropriate to use the word "pussy"? What music do you listen to in your spare time? I'm eagerly awaiting your upcoming petition to ban all rap music

like

Why are people in this thread equating swearing, using 4 letter words the same as using derogatory language. Hey, change OPs original story, in the story that was being told, what if the guy had related the story and said that his friend called him gay, or a f*g, or used the n word. This has never been about swear words.

This is a work happy hour, not the office. WAP was the most popular song on the radio for a while lol

like

Well the radio clean version, which is dirty as heck, but one thing it doesn't do is say the word p***y, so maybe not the best example?

I don’t think you should have said anything and judged them quietly in your head like I’m sure everyone else did.

like

People swear in bars. Virtual or otherwise.

like

Is OP a bartender? Your comment is irrelevant considering OP is specifically referencing a work experience.

likefunny

I would have mentioned it to him after the call. That’s inappropriate language at a work event. Period. See it, hear it, speak up.

likefunny

Walk it off. Rub some dirt on it. You'll be ok!

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Let the old man live.

like

Or let him retire. This is just basic professionalism.

funny

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