The opportunity: A CD opening at an amazing agency in Europe (I’m American). The dilemma: I’m 8 weeks pregnant. The visa process is time consuming and expensive and I will likely go on maternity leave shortly after arriving. Do I tell them? Or just see how it goes and then spring it on them? File under: Things men never have to think about.

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I may seem sneaky in saying this, but no one has the right to know about your pregnancy this early. Not employers, not friends— no one who you don’t choose to bring into your life. I would never tell an employer in my first trimester. It’s an uncertain time and this job is uncertain. I wouldn’t consider this as springing it on them. It’s a fact of life— people get pregnant. Maybe as you get further in the process, but for now still apply and try your best to get the job and reconsider telling them when you find out how long the visa will take. Don’t take yourself out of the game so soon!

Ps there’s a “women in advertising” bowl that may have more knowledgeable answers!

likehelpful

another wholeheartedly agree w/ VMYLR. If the shoe were on the other foot and there was a business situation that may or may not affect the job you just upended your life for, possibly 7 months down the road, or a difficult client or co worker you'd be thrown in with, a company would not mention it. Remember not to expect companies to behave like empathetic humans. They are business first. Take care of you. You are clearly an honest, hardworking person who probably does 3 times the work of your male counterparts before, during and after your pregnancy. They are lucky to have you.

likehelpful

It’s europe. They probably will say, “oh congrats, and don’t forget you get a year off here. Please take your time, your health and family are number one!”

likehelpful

“Hoh hoh, make sure that you rest for 4 days each the week, and ‘ave plenty of wine, hoh hoh hoh!”

If this was an American company I wouldn’t tell them because it’s a protected status but there’s something about this situation that feels like I’d be acting in bad faith if I didn’t let them know that if they hired me, I probably couldn’t actually work for them until this time next year.

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I agree, I think you get to experience an astonishingly different European attitude toward health care and work. Im male so, to the extent that its my business, it does seem like its only right to tell them (you can work from home in the meantime right?) when you get the job offer.

likehelpful

How far are you into the process? Can you just wait til you get the offer and then worry about it? That way they’ve invested more time in you and will want to make things work for you.

likehelpful

@CD1 Every man who has raised a child. Including myself. I didn’t want to rock the boat and put more pressure on the family. I stayed with my current company who I’d built up credit with. I put my career on autopilot to focus on this next big chapter. HONEST conversations is key IMO.

Tell them. And then have a conversation about it. Trust me. Moving country is emotional and you don’t wanna start off on uncertain/rocky ground with your new employer.

helpful

Yeah, Europe is much more progressive with maternity

There are laws in place to stop employers backtracking on offers and you only have to tell them when you're ready.

helpful

Dutch process is very fast if you’re on highly skilled migrant visa. (I’m an American in the Netherlands myself). And congrats! Im glad they are still hiring, it’s really tough to get a job here right now.

helpful

😬😬😬 I feel like getting through the visa process would be your biggest concern. Also depending on the Country, they take their contracts very seriously. Which city?

Just read P1’s answer. Can confirm it is correct. Only took roughly 4 weeks for my visa approval here. If you have more questions feel free to message me directly, I’m very curious about the process and how other agencies are doing here.

likehelpful

I don’t have any solid advice for you. Who is handling your paperwork? The company’s lawyer or do you have an attorney of your own assisting with the visa and other paperwork?

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