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I don’t think she’s trying to scare you. First time births take a long time
I think average labour is higher than that for first time parents. I had a 25hr first labour & a much faster second labour. I had just gas & air for both my labours (but was in a hospital setting and pleased to be there)
Same. 30+ hrs
I was induced and they say it could take up to 72 hours for first births.
I had an unmedicated natural birth. I learned pretty quickly that my body goes through delivery very quickly. Looking back I realize that I was in labor throughout the day but my goal was to labor at home as long as possible. Essentially I went into active labor while I was still at home. Called an ambulance that got me to the hospital and I delivered within the hour.
My second delivery turned out to be the same! I labored at home too long (unknowingly), had to call an ambulance but this time didn’t make it on the stretcher and had the baby in the living room.
Everyone is different. I listened to positive birth stories, educated myself on natural births and tried to keep my mental state as positive as possible. I’m convinced this was a big factor in my confidence and ability to deliver naturally and unmedicated. You can do it!!
I used a similar strategy to get in the right mindset. I had an unmediated natural birth. I did however make it to the hospital. I also tried to stay at home as long as possible and when we finally decided to go to the hospital it felt like we barely made it. I had my baby girl two hours after getting to the hospital and the pushing part lasted for about 7 minutes. It felt even shorter but I could see the details after as my midwife noted it down. I did t have a doula just a midwife and a nurse that came and went. My husband was also a key support person for me :)
Also don’t listen to a bunch of difficult or tough birth stories. It will just make you nervous
Sounds pretty normal and makes sense that you would need to source your own doula. My first labor was about 42 hours.
You don’t have to source a doula but I do agree that pain management technics are a good to have. I had a doula for my first and it was so helpful.
Wife did unmedicated and natural. Not required but would highly recommend investing in a good doula as you’ll want the coaching/support. Labored ~30 hr, of which 8 were at hospital. 10/10 she’d do it again. You’ve got this!
I know a lot of not so great labor stories, but you can just ChatGPT the average for a first time mom.
If you want more positivity, I planned to do unmedicated natural births for both my children at two different hospitals (moved states in between 1&2) and both really helped facilitate and encouraged me.
Birth 1: water broke naturally at home, contractions didn’t start for a few more hours, baby was out 12 hours after my water initially broke.
Birth 2: water broke naturally at home again, contractions didn’t really start till 7-8 hours after that (weird, I know!), so I was “only” in pain for ~3 hours before baby came out. This was 10 hours from water breaking.
Don’t get me wrong, contractions once they hit were the worst pain of my life, but it wasn’t long like many people say.
I also only pushed once or twice once baby was ready to come out each time. Maybe it was my fitness level, prenatal yoga, who knows. But I hear horror stories of pushing for hours and that wasn’t me.
Good luck! Write down the birth plan YOU want and go for it!
Good to get lots of perspectives as every birth is different. I was induced for both kids at 41 weeks and took 15-20 hours to be ready to push, then pushed for 3 hours with my first and 30 minutes with my second.
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Thanks for the perspective, everyone. Very helpful!
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You would need to find your own doula if you choose to have one, that’s normal, the midwife doesn’t pick it for you. However, they can/should give you resources to find one.
I had an unmedicated birth with and I highly recommend having a doula! It’s just really really helpful to have that person in the room to support you and help with decisions in the moment. I actually think your midwife is trying to set you up for success. If it’s a requirement to have a doula in order to go unmedicated, that’s seems weird (but wise).
16-24hrs actually feels low as an average to me.
Unmedicated home birth. Started labor while on a walk around 7pm, mucus plug came out when I got home around 7:45pm. Was deep into labor by 11:45pm. Had baby at 1:15pm the next day. It honestly felt fast and not sure I’d want a faster birth for the first time. Your body is opening up and it takes time. Definitely get a doula. All the hands on techniques they do make labor so much less painful and they can really help with positioning.
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Thanks everyone!
Honestly as a provider I’d drop OP as a client. Based on what training or knowledge are you making the judgement that the average labor lasts 16-34 hours is “high”? I’d never deliver someone who talked to me like this because they’re the people who will end up trying to sue you.
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@BCLS1