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When you ask the intern to take meeting notes

And another one bites the dust
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Yes. It was awful, and unlike you, I didn’t recognize it at the time. I blamed myself for everything, got super anxious, OCD skyrocketed, it was horrible, and i was horrible to be around. I don’t know that I have any advice, but I applaud you for having the self-awareness to see what’s going on and not turn the blame inward. It’s been 4 years since I left and I feel like I’m finally no longer beating myself up. (Perception v reality isn’t my strong suit when it comes to this stuff.)
Be confident in your work, your intelligence, your output. Stand firm on the things that you know are right, and be flexible and engaging when you can. But for this type of personality, I’d advise you to hold firm to who you are. When you start to do the mental gymnastics of trying to second guess his actions and your behavior and his reactions, you might as well call it, but that’s that moment that you will make yourself insane. Ask me how I know. Good luck and hang in there.
I’m in therapy, that’s why I could see it. I don’t feel less worth because of his behaviour. But he has been telling people I’m inefficient, when in fact he should be the one managing his team better, by not bombarding me with minor corrections and last minute requests all the time.
Im hanging in there but I’m getting super anxious and stressed out. I’m trying to move to another account, which I think it might happen, but I’m concerned that other males in the company might think he is right. He is so awful that he convinces new preys every time, like he has a new one now, after I stared drawing some lines. It’s always a female, with serious life issues or somehow insecure and vulnerable and very likely to accept all his “help”, before he starts crashing them. When I psychologically detached from him, he started to retaliate me.
I just don’t know how to escape this whole situation without being accusative when talking to our manager and without losing good references in case I need to leave my job.
Yes and I went to HR and reported him. Many people had complained about him so he was fired a few months later. If you can document everything and talk to HR so there’s a paper trail. Chances are you’re not the only one he’s treating badly. Good luck!
Ugh he sounds horrible. Start taking notes maybe during his critiques. Some people should not be bosses.
A female boss. Yes. I’m in therapy.
Good for you that you are in therapy! It helps a lot!
its not personal, its an unhappy, unhealthy person! hang in there
Thank you! Just trying not to let him sink in my mind too much.
Female boss for me too. Was awful, gave me so much anxiety.
Previous boss was a guy — no issues. Great working relationship.
I’ve had it twice in my career - one male and one female. It’s awful. Keep in mind HR’s responsibility is to protect the company, not you. Unfortunately, this business has no real protections for when people with power over your ability to pay your mortgage to not engage with you properly for legitimate or illegitimate reasons. I’ve found it best to let go and look to move versus fight to keep a role continuing to report into this person, and/or take the risk of reporting them. Sometimes this industry just really sucks. Sorry to hear you’re in it right now. Hope you find resolution.
Seconded: Female boss. Gah.
I guess it’s even worse