{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "how does child custody work given my travel schedule? been thinking about a divorce and have two young boys. would I get every weekend and she gets Mon to Thursday? I want it to be fair to her too", "post_id": "5d686b67013882002ba85cc6", "reply_count": 11, "vote_count": 1, "bowl_id": "599aea2d2a4d83001641590b", "bowl_name": "Consulting Dads" }

how does child custody work given my travel schedule? been thinking about a divorce and have two young boys. would I get every weekend and she gets Mon to Thursday? I want it to be fair to her too

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Honestly: quit and establish a local job ASAP. She’ll use your travel schedule to lobby for full custody.

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Dude. Talk to a lawyer now. My ex and I do week on, week off, and it works fine.

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kpmg1 see that's where I'd be screwed. I just moved into role from industry. career feels on fast track now and travel is heavy. I enjoy having Friday to Sun with kids... cutting that precious time in half would be really hard for me

I get 3/4 weekends each month with Friday pick up. she gets them M-F. I offer to do more when I don't travel but she rarely takes me up on it. sometimes she wants them more on weekends and I give her extra days when she asks. At this point there was no need for me to switch jobs. it may cost more for alimony and child support but I like my consulting lifestyle. my recommendation is to stay flexible and try to minimize attorney fees.

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This job (kinda) works with kids if you have either A) a committed spouse or B) serious local family support as a single parent. It does NOT work when someone who is actually better situated it care for kids (or local) is trying to take them from you. You’re trying to walk a line that doesn’t exist.

I say this as a guy who is divorced: your marriage is not a consulting project. You don’t get to decide that it just isn’t working for you anymore. You made a lifelong commitment. My ex was genuinely crazy and became abusive, and getting divorced was the right call. Ultimately it made for the best situation for our kids and I don’t regret it for a moment. But I definitely did not take a “let’s give it another year and see how I feel” kind of approach. Divorce is a thing you do when there’s no way to keep the marriage viable, not something you do because you don’t feel like being married anymore.

Not sure if your spouse works, but if she does, it’s very unfair for her imo. She may be local, but she gets to work and also do the grunt work of taking care of the kids, picking them up from day care while you get to keep the fun part of the weekend. Even if she doesn’t, if your kids are going to schools, aren’t they busy M-F? Weekends are the supposed “fun” time. You aren’t contributing to the “work” part because of your travel already, and you are trying to take the “fun” part all for yourself. Just my 2 cents.

k2, I totally agree. weekends are the fun times and m-f is busy. but that's part of my question, because if it's not every weekend then what would I be left with right? like 2 weekends a month period. guess I'd just alt travel a lot. like I said, I'm trying to understand the options. call it assessment, then strategy and then implementation I guess.

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