I started reading “the Tao of Pooh”, and I really just don’t understand why I can’t stop chasing after this “Great Reward”. I originally thought it was GC, because I was running away from my family of origin.
But now I find myself in this trap of hamster wheel where if I slack and don’t watch out for my “career growth”, I could end up not being able to even find a job.
My income increase becomes a cause for more spending on career coach, networking events & therapy sessions

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If therapy isnt cutting it get a new therapist.

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I actually clicked very week with my current therapy, but my anxiety and depression act up now and again. Even after talking with the therapist helped a lot, during the time when I am having some bad episodes, it’s usually in the middle of the night, so I can’t get help.

How do people do this? It really feels like an endless master wheel, without rest in sight. The worst part is, if I don’t keep running, I risk losing security. Kinda wanna just end this all for good. How do you all handle this feeling of an endless trap?

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Have you read Start with why? You need to understand why you are doing what you are doing. Without understanding your why it’s difficult to look in other options. Are you Indian or Asian origin brought up in a super competitive environment? Do you have other hobbies and family (kids)?

Thank you KPMG! I think I need to revisit my why. The initial reason is not clear and strong enough. Thank you, that’s a good advice. I will read that book & think about exactly why I “want” to stay in the US, instead of just why I don’t wanna settle back home.

I’m Asian. My family is not as much about competitive as about judgmental and shaming.
Not as much about career achievement but more about being “a good child who provides for and obeys the elders even when the elders are all sorts of abusive”

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