I’m looking to receive some advice. It seems that I have vented as much as I can (in person) with no avail on how to potentially rectify this issue.

I work within a small team with about 2 1/2 direct reports (the 1/2 reports to be at times but not at all the time however they respect me as if they report to me all the time). Out of my 2 1/2 team, I’ve had issues with one of them. They do not seem to respect or adhere to anything that I say whether it is a straight forward ask or suggestion(1)

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Is the position this person in union? This changes how you can approach the situation (length of time, tracking, etc)

The two that are full time, do you have hire-fire power? Or does the director have that? Either way you have a potential case that HR needs to be involved. The HR rep should be able to help you with techniques to manage said person.

If you are not getting help, I strongly suggest looking elsewhere.

That said, you need to be documenting everything related to work activities. And if it is not working out, you could be moving towards a performance improvement plan - but to get that going, you need to have documented proof.

If you are not documenting things related to this situation, you need to start asap. Primarily to support how you have gotten to this situation and the steps you have tried to resolve and the continued process forward. This is to protect you as the manager.

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Incredibly conflict adverse. They do not liking being disliked which makes it a tough situation a lot of the time (especially when “tough love” is needed).

(2) They get very easily annoyed (visibility annoyed) if things do not go their way (in our office there is a lot of sharing i ideas and listing the pros + cons). It has gotten to a point where several colleagues wish to not work directly with them. Although I’ve spoken to them about their “attitude”, they will literally turn around and do it again not even 10 minutes later and dismiss what I say.

I don’t know if it’s an age thing (I am 10 years their junior) or if it’s just an overall disdain for me. I have asked my director for advice and guidance to no avail.

Does anyone have insight on how to handle this or have an experience with this also?

Noted! Thank you!

Have any of their ideas ever been taken into consideration or are they always dismissed? If I was part of a team that constantly bashed my ideas I’d be miserable too. Is it because of their age? Also it’s a good idea to get to know people on a 1:1 basis on a bi-weekly call or something. Introverts have a hard time in “sharing is caring” sessions. Are they introverted? Also, sometimes work isn’t even the problem. If they told you they are dealing with something hard like a diagnosis, divorce, sick parents, etc. work not going well is only compounding it. Remember everyone on your team is still a human with a life outside of work. Hope this helps.

No, their ideas aren’t bashed and if I sense that they are (when I’m there) I always make sure their ideas are acknowledged.

I have scheduled 1:1 to get to know them better and try to be flexible as much as possible when it seems that life is getting them down. They are very extroverted.

Anytime I check in with them, I always ask how are they (on the human level) and if I can support them (on the workload level).

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