My manager (male) peer pressures/ bullies people into drinking during social outings. E.g. will order multiple rounds of shots during dinner and pressure you until you take it. I’ve tried driving to these events as an excuse to get out of drinking, but he will order me an Uber and tell me to pick my car up another day. My partner and I are considering trying to get pregnant, and I’m worried on how to navigate situations like these. I’m only 3 months into this company so don’t want to tell him

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Just say you don’t drink. But remember the lie. Lol. Don’t accidentally come in one Monday talking about being the bar the weekend before

like

White lies -
You’re trying to cut sugar out of our diet and alcohol is an easy one (so u can still eat that cookie)…say with a chuckle.
You have pesky annual exam coming up and are trying a water flush so ur #’s are better
Ugh…u just started a new allergy med and it makes u so sleepy with alcohol
You have a slight sinus infection and ur dr gave ur antibiotics that don’t mix well with alcohol
You’re allergic?? (Yes i have a friend who is, so it’s a thing!)

like

Next time, just politely decline - make it no big deal that you say no but be firm. I've often used the tactic of playing up that I'm not really a strong drinker, and it hits me heavier than most. That way, I can order something to hold and drink soda water and lime or hold a bear for the night wile drinking water.

I use the following phrases quite often. The key is to be sure and secure in saying no.

-- Oh No! I'm not doing shots ever again
-- Tequila/bourbon/jack/rumple mints?! Hell no not after last time
-- I will stick with what i have
--Last time I was so sick,
-- I'm trying slow
-- Tomorrow's a bid day, I want to make sure my head's clear
-- I'm good, give mine to so-and-so

like

Don’t go to the outing in the first place, that’s what I would do. If you do go, be strong and if you get pressure you can make a joking/not joking comment about talking to HR…

His behavior would be a policy violation at my company. We (managers) actually have mandatory training about NOT doing exactly that. Perhaps file an anonymous complaint - do you have an employee helpline?

At minimum, use EY1’s advice

Just stand your ground and say no to the drinks. You don't have to give a reason. Your manager sounds a bit juvenile to be "forcing" people to drink but they are probably trying to get people to relax and have fun. But you don't need everyone drunk to have fun on a work's night out. Just say no thanks!

I wish :( I have tried but he literally makes a huge scene if I don’t drink. He means well but doesn’t understand what he’s doing

I don’t drink due to a family history of alcoholism. What happened to no meaning no.

"I dont drink. Im on medication that should not be mixed with alcohol."

Related Posts

What do I do if I’ve only worked one job (the one I’m currently at) and another company is asking for references? I could do professors from college but not sure if that’s a good idea. I wish I could give my current manager’s contact but I don’t want her knowing :/

like

What do you wear when your firm sends you to do law school recruitment? (I’m a woman fwiw)

like

Any recommendation on gym/trainers around union station? I checked FFC and few others around this place and they all seem very expensive.

Moving to Chicago in a few weeks from a state on the quarantine list. Been in a different (safe) state but going to my state of residence in a few days to pack up - planning to self quarantine (contd)

like

I live in VA, been married for 6 years and have no kids. My spouse and I are just separated and about to get divorced in a month. My spouse left their job a year after we married due to which, I need.

Has anyone taken Cymbalta for depression / anxiety? Do you recommend it? I’m so scared of meds!! WhAt side effects to be aware of (short and long term)

Does anyone know what the dress code is for the upcoming CAALA Trial Skills seminar? Do people usually wear suits or is it business casual? Thank you!

like

Salaam. 26 M. Houston. My hobbies are traveling, watching sports, and hanging out with friends. Hope to get married this year, ان شاء الله.

like

Does anyone have success conceiving with low AMH? I am 30 yo and my AMH is 1.11, RE says it's low for my age.

like

If buy the partners you work with regularly a holiday gift, how much do you spend? Usually I get baked goods or food items which you can’t tell the actual amount spent on. This year, though, I’d like to support local restaurants by encouraging people to order takeout—hence, giving gift cards.

How much is appropriate for a restaurant gift card from an associate to a partner?

Hi everyone, have a noob question here. When did you share the pregnancy news with your employer? Not sure when it’s optimal to do that. :)

like

Anyone feel like their job gives them severe anxiety issues that you've never had before?

like

Anyone have tickets to Dallas arboretum for tomorrow they don't plan to use?! 😬

like

Had a dope weekend of fried food/bbq/liquor in Atlanta. But now feeling backed up. What’s a good simple way to flush out my system quick that doesn’t involve a medical professional and tubes?

like

What does everyone wear for client meetings in a WFH setting

like

I am membership director for a medical based fitness facility on the west side. We offer corporate partnerships. I would love to network with companies in Indianapolis!

likeuplifting

What do you value most to make a work environment attractive to you?

like

Hi all, healthcare question here. If premiums are equal and my employer is funding my deductible under HDHP up to the deductively under the PPO plan being offered, then which plan is preferable and why? I read all the materials about both plans but I’m still not really sure which one is better for me - it seems like the difference comes down to co-pays and the HSA. Any advice or insight is welcome.

Best gyms in Philly? Pre-covid I was doing a mix of OrangeTheory, F45, Corepower Yoga, with a few other places mixed in from ClassPass. Thoughts on the nicest gym? Located in Fishtown but would go down to nolibs/old city/midtown village too

like

More Posts

Just found out there’s an ECD in a big NYC agency who claims to have won awards, but the name doesn’t pop up in any of the archives.

How do they get away with it?

like

If my recon doesn't add up, can I blame Russia?

like

Only one associate remains on my team now... giving 2 weeks Friday.

like

@Partners - how much money do you need to invest I to the firm to get your partner share?

likefunny

I just started a new job and am about to be 36. I want to start a family but I feel like I should be waiting due to this new job. However I don’t want to miss out. I’m thinking about freezing my eggs

like

Hi to everyone, I am looking for a referral in MBB for wealth management or PE teams, is there anyone that can help me? I am currently enrolled in CFA lvl. I and have 4 yrs of IT strategy consulting experience.

like

Trying to pay it forward 🐠: brilliant rising Senior at my undergraduate alma mater [Washington & Lee] wants to take a detour through consulting before Medical School. I’ve given the real...[Cont.]

Any companies pulling back on recruiting or freezing hiring altogether?

like

I got an offer in industry! Feeling excited but at the same time very confused. It’s a good offer that I don’t want to pass up but also feel extremely bad leaving during busy season. Is a 3 week notice enough? Do I let this opportunity go and just hope something will line up down the road ? Thoughts ?

like

Good afternoon everyone,

I am switching careers from Clinical Social Work into Project Management. I possess many transferable skills and a PM certification. I'd love a referral to PM roles at Google, Meta, Amazon or other Big Tech Companies. I'd also love to connect with other PMs in the tech space on LinkedIn if interested!

like
likesmart

Woohoo! Welcome deals pros!

like

Hi Fishes,
What will be the annual hike/increment at Bny Mellon,Pune for Senior QA and Test Analyst position and will a professional whois joining in the month of November be considered for the annual appraisal in the appraisal cycle?
Could anyone advice on this?

like

Is the notice period for AVPs 3 months in hsbc?

like

Hey everyone! I am working on a report with the intention of updating the products that a specific customer uses. Currently, the data is arranged with the unique ID in Column A, and associated products in Column B. However, each product has its own row so company 1234 might have 5 rows and company 5678 might have 20. What I need to do is collect the product data for each unique company and put it into a single row, separated by a comma(s). I am at a crossroads, any suggestions?

like

Anyone here whose joining is on 27th june?

like

Hello Fishes,

Anyone here as VP or AVP in barclays...I've came across with one very suitable opening with barclays... Can anyone reffer me please?

like

Hey everyone! What decent reason can I give for leaving sooner than notice period? I have 2 months NP. Would love to get out of here in a month. My boss let a teammate go in 2 weeks with same NP who said that he had COVID and need a long break from work. He was actually switching job while he got COVID. Same story won't work for me. Thank you.

like

Colleague said “oh hello, who the fuck are you?” When I brought up what I guess was an unwanted opinion. This was years ago when I was more junior.

I’ve seen BareFaced mentioned a few times in this bowl. Previously I’d never heard of it. How does it compare to a SkinCeuticals or a Obagi - especially for products like VitC and serums?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal