Running meetings with my team feels like talking to an empty room. I ask for input...nothing. I try open-ended questions...blank stares. Then, like clockwork, half of them Slack me after the meeting with concerns or (honestly, really good) ideas they didn’t say out loud. I don’t want to start cold-calling on people but I also can’t lead if I’m the only one talking. How do you get a quiet team to actually speak up when it matters, instead of saving all their best thoughts for later?

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Clearly they dont feel safe speaking out loud in a group. Either driven internally or due to external factors. First, try to make them feel safe to open up. Icebreakers may help and if that does not work have an open conversation with them in their 1:1. Try to get to the root cause instead of making assumptions and shooting in the dark.

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Sometimes having the team members take turns taking charge of the meeting can help get folks to open up too. Do a simple rotation, let each person know ahead of time so they don’t feel surprised.

Ice breakers can be good as well, though sometimes those feel too forced. (And as an introvert they can be a nightmare).

Another way to welcome folks and encourage them to open up is to start each meeting by highlighting something good someone in the group did and giving them quick kudos. This way works well if you can find something to highlight each individual in the team for, because you don’t want to leave people feeling like one person is your favorite.

Alternatively, encourage the team to thank/appreciate each other by starting with peer recognition.

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I’ve been there, staring at blank faces on Zoom, and it’s so frustrating when you’re trying to get a convo going. Sounds like maybe the team needs to bond more to feel comfortable speaking their minds in front of each other. Have you tried some ice breakers?

Taking on the information you provided, it sounds like there is a huge lack of trust amongst your team. They do not feel they can provide input or ask questions without feeling foolish - either because you (which from comment about post meeting input sounds unlikely) or other team members will shut them down or mock them. It may be the underlying team culture is one that discourages failure.

You jeed to get the team comfortable with the fact that the only stupid questions or bad inputs are those that are spoken out loud. They need to learn that there are only two types of acceptable feedback - positive or neutral (and objective comment clarifying what has been heard). They need to know that one person’s “stupid” question can inspire others to speak up or take the team to another level of problem solving. The concept from improv of “yes and…” - you acknowledge the input of another and build on it. You don’t correct them or deny them their point - you keep building on it (otherwise improv isn’t funny…).

Cold call people, seriously. Bystander syndrome is real.
If you're ever getting murdered in front of a crowd of people, the secret is the point to a specific person and ask them for help, not to yell at the group for help. The latter does not create a sense of personal responsibility as, "someone else will do it."
I apply this to my meetings with software engineers, who are very introverted and almost never volunteer to speak into a silence and it works very well.

I had some luck with giving folks the option to share their ideas in writing ahead of time. Then I'd be the one to read them out in the meeting so other people could respond to them/riff on them. I have a colleague who tells me she's had good results by using a digital whiteboard that people can contribute to -- that loses the anonymity but keeps the not-having-to-speak-in-front-of-everyone. Also can the group be made smaller so speaking is less intimidating?

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