How to help a colleague that is burning out and having panic/anxiety attacks? I told him to take some time off work for his mental health and I’ll help finish his projects but he’s not willing since everyone on our team has high work load. Not sure how else to help him.

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You can't.

Your only option is to convey your concerns to your lead but ONLY if you DEFINITIVELY know your lead is trustworthy and would help not make it worse.

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You can never "definitely" know that about someone at work, so don't throw them under the bus with such an assumption

He needs to go to his partner and tell them the situation is not working and what he wants instead. I thought this was going to cause all kinds of negative things but once I finally was honest that my situation was untenable I have all kinds of people supporting me I never thought would give two shits that I'm not happy. Also, don't make it about the anxiety and panic attacks, that's what the EAP is for, focus on what he needs from the firm to fix the cause.

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Gotta let him realize it. If anything try hanging out to do non work things, if you're in the same area and comfortable doing that.

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