My girlfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for 8 months now. We talk every single day online and recently I went to visit her for around a month. It was great and it seemed like the relationship was stronger than ever. But one week back after visiting her, I felt a strange detachment from her and our conversation topic got repetitive and stale quick. Any advice?

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Have you talked to her about it? In general though unless you have a plan to be together again real soon (and most of the time, even then), LDR relationships are doomed.

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Don’t think this is 100% true. But having a game plan or sense of an end in sight looks like helps. Knowing who’s moving where etc and setting goals helps. I tend to miss my SO more after time apart and feel happier though.

Are you integrated into one another’s social circles?

As someone who dated long-distance during b-school, integrating my SO into my MBA friend group was game changing. Not only did it make his visits more fun, but he was genuinely interested whenever I shared updates or random stories about my school friends

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Don’t talk everyday. Give yourself a couple days to go off, miss her and make new memories that you can share with her in between your visits.

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Don’t talk at all?? I’m curious because otherwise I feel very detached to my LD Bf.

The internet and our connectivity is SO new and puts weird strains on otherwise healthy relationships because of the need (or perceived need) of constant communication.
I don’t have a helpful way out, but it’s a wild phenomenon.

My boyfriend and I have been together about 6 months. 4 of which have been distance. We typ talk 1-2 times a week because it’s mostly how’s work. Good. What’s new? Nothing much or random topics. I’d say have something to look forward to and it’ll spice up conversations. We’re planning a trip to a new place for both of us for his birthday and talk almost every night because we’re excited to plan. Or sometimes we just watch tc together and text. It doesn’t need to be in depth convos every night.

I was in a long distance relationship for 2 years. She lived in the US and I lived in the UK.

It was hard and communication was key to its success. We also dedicated time to each other everyday where possible. Watch the same shows, read the same books (this was very helpful) and talk about important things.

I’m pleased to say we’ve been married since 2018 and have a 10 month old daughter. We’re so thankful for that time apart. It was hard but when you have the initial infatuation stripped back, it forces you to attempt to connect on a deeper level through your words and understanding. It just depends how much do you want it and what the end goal is.

Best of luck. I’m sure you’ll do great. DM me if you ever want a chat!

Thanks!

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