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I save first and then whatever is left I spend however the heck I want. If I spent first and then saved what was left, I'd never save anything.
While I respect monks and their choices, I wouldn’t be able to live like one. I have more than enough clothes, shoes, accessories and don’t need any more. I don’t prioritize these things anymore, so it’s helpful and reasonable for me to limit new items to 5 each year. It’s also saves me time because I don’t need to declutter as frequently. I prioritize travel and live experiences, so that’s where most of my discretionary spending goes towards. I go on about 40 personal trips a year so no deprivation in my life.
What I found works best is to pay my savings account and my investment account automatically out of each paycheck. My check is deposited by my employer, and the next day a set amount comes out for each. What's left is mine to pay bills and live on until the next check shows up. I don't beleive in carrying credit card debt, so I only use it for the points and then pay it off each month. I won't charge anything I can't pay off. It's hard at first, but gets easier as it becomes a habit. Good luck!
I do something similar. I’m a proud shopaholic. I simply love to shop. I have major interest in it. Most of my life, I was terrible at saving and nothing really worked for me. I recently started to save in September and found that the only thing that worked for me was making my savings an “expense“. Pretending it was a bill to pay. Retirement came automatically out of my checks. And personal savings came out of my checks as well into a HYSA thats kind of annoying to withdraw from, so my Shopping Monster doesn’t bother to pull from it since pulling from it won’t give me immediate access but access to the funds days later which defeats the point of “Instant Gratification “ 🤣🤣😭
I have found it’s so much better to treat saving like a bill. I automatically take $200 every pay period and put it into my savings just as if I was paying a bill. By the end of a few years, you’ll be amazed at how much you’ve saved. Good luck. 
Needs not wants.
Does your company have a 401K or similar plan? Start contributing to it if you're not already. Start with 1%, 1 cent out of a dollar. Add a percent every time you get a pay raise. Yes, contribute more if you like. Do not take any money out of the plan until you can do so without penalty. When you reach that age, consider carefully before taking any money out. Good luck.
It's not that hard
Ask yourself if you need it, or if you want it. When trying to save money, only get what you need. Then feel free to get yourself a little gift at the end of the week and consider it a reward for your hard work. I'd suggest a savings account that goes strictly untouched except for emergencies. If you can get into this mentality and habit, you should be saving up a lot more and quickly than you are now.
I've learned. I like to "Buy" as I need. I bank more than ever and Shop "Deals",bargains and sales...Bills paid first You need "savings" for Emergencies.
Make budget to your self , i suggest you use spreadsheet.
You need to understand the money coming and where its spening and how much, then you make pocket money for your self for exapmle $200 a fortnight this wht you spend on shopping , and you need to make saveing account that you dont see it on daily basis and transfer for exapmle %20 a fortnight of the left over after you paid all fixed expenses, eventually you'll start save , I susges you invest this money in shares and you dont touch it unless you doing something worth it .
Tend to spend and either never save or only save if I have a large outgoing coming soon such as Car bills etc.
Don't ever let the cash touch your bank account. Invest first. For example, if a 401k or similar retirement plan is offered where you work, set it up to come out of your paychecks immediately before it even gets to you in cash. I've done this since I was in my twenties and never missed the piece I was saving because I never got used to spending it. Additionally, save anything extra that comes along. If you get promoted at work, save the additional (minus whatever is needed for cost of living inflation adjustment) and continue living as if your salary never changed. Don't become a victim of trying to keep up with the Joneses. Build your wealth, don't show it off.
To me, money=freedom (gives you options, peace of mind, etc). I don’t have a strong urge to buy stuff just for the sake of buying stuff + it’s not hard to save with my current income
I’m focusing on making more money instead of saving more
That’s fine if you can keep lifestyle creep under control
Excercise some self control and just stop shopping unless there is something you actually need. It is really quite simple.
HR is right and I was super traumatized with a shopping addiction and 25k debt. It has to be a decision: stop all purchases cold turkey unless necessary. It helps stop the addiction. Then you learn about money and start spending carefully and wisely.
I had money automatically move into a brokerage account each month so it was never visible to me to spend.
When you have a general anxiety you are prioritizing your future. Anxiety is the pain in the ass for me in many aspects, but over here it made me to learn and to prioritize saving and investing. And it definitely worked.
I will also add to it that you need to understand your goals. For example, I'm planning to leave US and want to rely to my investments somewhat, so while contributing to 401k is crucial maxing it out doesn't make sense to me and this is what people automatically suggest here.
Don't just listen to people because everyone else does it.
Budgeting budgeting budgeting. Budget for accelerated debt payoff. Budget for retirement savings. Budget for other savings goals (car, house, vacation, whatever). Budget for essential spending (housing, food, transportation, medical). Budget for fun (eating out, clothes/shoes/personal care, entertainment). Fund debt payoff, savings, and essential spending FIRST, out of every paycheck. Put savings in separate accounts, or even move to a different financial institution so it is “out of sight, out of mind.” Discretionary spending happens out of what is left. By saving first, you get to “broke” faster in each paycheck and it forces you to spend less.
Best approach is to get an independent financial advisor from when you you hit 18 or start work. The suggestions mine has made over the years have paid off and my pension fund is on track to be twice what i live on now. Roll on retirement when I have both time and money
You'd have to find the root cause of why you're doing what you're doing. There is probably an underlying need that you're trying to meet through behaviours that aren't serving you well. Check out this article, this could shed some light https://medium.com/@repromptingproject/mma-social-media-and-human-needs-a087ed2bca82
Subject Expert
I bet the OP's unmet need is not MMA.
I used to struggle with spending too, so I changed how I think about saving. I treat it like spending—almost like a monthly subscription I have to pay. Using investment apps with gamification helped a lot, because seeing small daily gains makes it feel rewarding and motivates me to put more money into savings.
Do you track your expenses like in an Excel spreadsheet? If not maybe start there ... Track them to the best detail that you can, along with your earnings. It could be an eye opener.
Follow up: once you identify where your money is going you can then choose to spend/not spend on areas that you want your money to go to.