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That kid is my fucking spirit animal
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40 M Ontario, Canada
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White collar folks - how busy are you guys now?
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Honestly you are just going to have to figure out a way to accept this as your new normal (doing the best you can under the circumstances even if you feel like you aren’t at your best and being at peace with that). It is rough being pregnant in big law, but being a mom in big law is a million times harder in my opinion. I constantly feel like I am just barely surviving and do not at all feel like I am performing the same as I did as an associate without kids. My memory is worse and sometimes things slip through the cracks. But we are our own worst critics and a lot of what you are feeling about your performance is probably not visible to others, and I bet the people around you still think you are doing great. Hang in there! Even though it is hard, having kids is the best thing I have ever done and they are so much more special and fulfilling to me than this job
Working while pregnant is hard enough. A difficult pregnancy is exponentially harder. Give yourself the grace to do what you can the best you can. Take care of yourself first. You’re allowed to be exhausted. You’re allowed to have brain fog. It won’t be forever.
You get through it by reminding yourself everyday single day that you’re growing a human and that is hard and 9 months is a very short time in the span of an entire career so you need to take care of yourself and baby everyone else will deal just fine.
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Hang in there! Remember your and your baby’s wellbeing come before everything else and at the end of the day we aren’t saving lives so it’s perfectly okay to just do the best you can to get through each day, even if your “best” on any given day is not 100%.
This. Please prioritize yourself/your baby. I know someone who didn’t, she unfortunately lost her baby and almost died herself. This corporate job is not worth it.
My only other advice is that if you have a good reputation, people probably aren’t noticing nearly as much as you worry they are. I had a rough few months dealing with some health issues, multiple family emergencies, and a huge move and felt like I was dropping the ball on everything. But the reality is when you’re super hard working and responsive no one notices if you take a bit longer to respond or you make a small mistake (frankly, I’m more of a perfectionist than a lot of partners I work for). I truly felt like I was dropping the ball everywhere and my reviews and feedback were as stellar as ever, and when I confided in a mentor about my concerns he laughed and was like, yeah you work too hard anyway no one even noticed, I wouldn’t have known anything was up had you not told me. I am sure the same is true for you too. Partners and clients are so damn busy with their own lives, they’re thinking so so much less about you than you think they are. So I really wouldn’t worry too much.
Take care of yourself and hang in there. And don’t be afraid to ask for accommodations to be fully remote. I had some health issues that have been resolved that caused a lot of extreme fatigue, nausea, gastric issues, etc. and being fully remote was a lifesaver. I have been fully remote for awhile so didn’t need to ask for an accommodation but absolutely would have if I had to spend any time in an office.
I’d do whatever you can to protect your pregnancy and reduce stress. Easier said than done but nothing is more important than that child so if you have to take leave early, consider it so you can put all your focus on yourself and baby