My best friend since high school just said I’m making excuses for myself when I explained that I think I may be neurodivergent, and that I’ve always felt like I process information differently (not always in a good way). She’s an ER doctor so I’m stunned and hurt. Is this not accepted as real in the medical field? Has anyone dealt with this pushback and waving off from people in your life you’re close to, not wanting to “believe” in neuro differences and how it can impact one’s life?

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My friend is a PCP and when I talked to her about the effect of serious early childhood trauma to someone else she said that a lot of people just make it up or have false memories.

I wouldn’t take heed in psych advice from a physician. Especially not an ER doc or a surgeon.

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Dr Amen (pretty famous doctor) has done brain scans showing decreased blood flow and activity in the prefrontal cortex of those with adhd compared to neurotypical brains, among other things. He’s identified 7 types of adhd based of different brain activity/scans. I highly recommend looking into his research if you’re looking for science to back that adhd is a real thing. Super interesting stuff!

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+1 To Dr. Amen, and yes. I absolutely have; literally my parents. And yes it is absolutely recognized by the medical field.
Dopamine deficiency, and problems synthesizing serotonin, are measurable real biological outcomes of ADHD.
She's an ER doctor, not a neurologist, so despite going to medical school; this is way out of her scope of expertise.

all of that being said, I know how much it hurts when the people we love don't give us the support that we need, and I am sorry you are going through that, now.

I have personally stopped speaking about ADHD with people who don't have ADHD.

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Best of luck! 🍀
Feel free to message me if you ever want to talk more. I'm not always on here, but I'll respond within a few weeks at the most.

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Everyone with a college degree ain't necessarily bright upstairs

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Your friend might be adept at treating head injuries, but they’re not a neurosurgeon or even a neuroscientist.

They sound like a very black and white neurotypical thinker and we need those types. But we do not need to discuss our mental health with such people. They’re simply incapable of understanding.

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Well said

uplifting

Guessing: Perhaps, rather than not believing you, what your friend meant was that you may be neurodivergent, but at a certain point, you need to figure out how to work around your ADD, or you’re just making excuses for yourself. If you had no legs, you’d use a wheelchair. You’d live/work in a place with no stairs, or an elevator. If you needed to do something that required legs, you’d figure out a way to get it done by using particular tools, or asking for help on that one task, or delegating. You wouldn’t be just, “Ope. No legs. Too bad for that task.” They might be saying that if you think you’re neurodivergent, get help — don’t just say it like it’s an observation that excuses your needing to conform to expectations.

Maybe that’s what your friend means. I don’t know — obviously.

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ER doctors are some of the dumbest kinds of doctors. They give that position to the lowest rung of doctors. They only need to treat people in a “one and done” fashion, there is almost zero long-term strategic thinking or any real way to see if diagnoses were correct. We need to stop treating doctors as genius oracles of knowledge.

Be a better person, CD1. Just… be better.

Perhaps she said this to you for reasons outside of what you shared in the post. Dismissing your opinions is frustrating, I agree.
Devils advocate, why do you think she would say this to you?
Have you deflected responsibility for reasons outside of your control before?

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