My overwhelmingly dreadful professional experience: a boss who constantly changes directions overnight and has no understanding of market concerns; endless books driven by personal connections; unreasonable work arrangements and being completely deprived of the due allocation of resources. some colleagues get to publish topics they are passionate about and build academic networks… while all I receive are lousy projects, low spirits, and work experience with no highlights whatsoever.

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I once tried to pitch some book proposals to my supervisor and the editor-in-chief, but every time, the reasons I received were unconvincing: "I don’t think anyone would be interested in this topic (feminism)"; "I don’t think now is the right time to take risks"; "I don’t think this book would become a bestseller"; "I think history is easy to read, but topics like law and philosophy have a high entry barrier—readers won’t enjoy them"...

Too many rejections, excessive workloads, frequent overtime, gradually fading self-confidence, and growing self-doubt have pushed my emotions to the brink... I’ve started to resent everyone in the company—my colleagues, people from other departments. Even slightly critical comments or suggestions from anyone could push me over the edge.

As for myself, I have no time to think, no time to develop my skills. Just getting through the workday consumes all my energy. It’s truly awful. I want to change this situation, but I don’t know where to start...

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You may be starting to feel burnout, and I’m sorry you’re going through this. Do thoughts of quitting your job tend to appear throughout the day? It may be time to leave, and it may make you feel better. I wish you strength during this difficult time 🙌

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I feel like I am a loser, an outsider in this working place

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I’m sorry you feel that way. It’s not worth your mental health. Get a new job

Why don’t you change your mindset and try to ask them for feedback? Obviously they’re looking for something that’s not aligned with what you’re trying to do.

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Change directions is part of her disgusting antics. If she did not like your point of view she would literally stick her fingers in her ears like a three year old. If you pulled emails from her that countered her new agenda get ready you might get a note to file for something that you did six months ago per her request that now she deems incorrect. HR knows that she does this and has witness the bad behavior and gotten reports of it but lies for her. Myself and few others just gave up.

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