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You probably don’t want to hear this, but they may not share the same view of friendship that you do or regard you as a close friend (even though you sound amazing and are a dedicated and reliable friend). I would hesitate in confronting her about this, people get weird and act abnormally entitled when it comes to their weddings - send a card and move on, there are many other people worthy of your friendship who will reciprocate and match if not exceed your efforts.
Different perspective: she may feel like you are above taking part in trivial things like that or that she views you are so much more “together” that you probably have more worthy friends/are too busy / etc to waste your time and she doesn’t want to make you feel obligated. I feel like I’ve been on both sides of this. I struggle to view other females I have a lot of respect for as equals who would want to be my friend. I also feel some females I used to mentor and viewed as friends never initiate anything to be equal friends but always wait for it to come from me.