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Not trying to be that person, but safe/walkable and San Francisco aren’t really possible. If you are downtown you need to be aware of random hopped up people and as a mother/daughter get back before dark unless it’s a show where most of the theaters have security and move people out of the area when shows let out.
If I had to pick I’d go the Palace or the JW or St Francis in union square for location, or pick somewhere you can Uber from (I usually stay in Japan Town or near the Presidio to avoid the downtown/SoMa characters.
If it helps I’m taking my 5 year old I’m a dad/son trip to DC. If did it with my older one as well and it’s a trio he still talks about. Easy to get around on the metro without a car, lots of free museums and a whole lot safer of a city. Unfortunately San Francisco isn’t alone in the decline but the last few years have really hit the city hard especially with the decreased foot traffic post-covid.
Stayed at St Francis with family last summer. It was a good value and good location. I wouldn’t go wandering around after dark but that’s true in any city.
Marriott marquis and St Regis are both fairly walkable in general.
St Regis does have an incline. We stayed there recently and loved the hospitality of the hotel. It’s got character but it’s not cheap. Middle of china town/ Japanese town so tons of food.
Marquis is a bigger newer property, and a little more centrally located. I’ll be honest - I walked around quite a bit during the day between these hotels and in general an didn’t think it felt unsafe. Both by myself ( female) and with people too. Obviously wouldn’t want to do it alone at night.