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Look up Thepointsguy and millionmilesecrets for a crash course
“Sham” is kind of a strong word, but there’s only a few select circumstances where they will give you a guaranteed (rather than waitlist) upgrade. Why would United give the seat to you instead of charging someone full freight for it if they can?
What’s your status level? The rules vary a bit by level.
That’s an -up fare and is also capacity controlled. If you’re booking that far out, call Mileage Plus. For additional points, you may be able to skip the line. It’s not available on all flights, but worth a shot.
@OP - think this article will explain more, but essentially you want to confirm there’s upgrade space available before booking the ticket, such that when you use your Plus Points, it auto clears. Otherwise, to your point, you’ll have to wait and wait and wait ... (oh and RPU / GPUs are the old Plus Points).
https://www.google.com/amp/s/thepointsguy.com/guide/united-expert-mode/amp/