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Chief
You’d be surprised! Similar situation and definitely did not prevent a lot of internalization.
Rising Star
Realized when I started in my current relationship that my addiction to sex was mainly because I was lonely/sad. It was almost like there was a void in my life that I was filling with constant casual sex. Having a partner present, being both emotionally and physically available for me, filled that void and I don’t have a desire for casual sex anymore. In fact, my sex drive went down significantly which I was not expecting.
In a previous LDR, we ended up being open after a few months at my request and I felt like I would always be addicted. Your partner may be similar or not. This was just my experience.
Rising Star
Yeah, I if I ever found out he was with someone else, I’d break it off immediately. I don’t share. At least he should have enough respect to make sure I don’t find out. But I don’t think that’s happening. But I get your point that the pressure and hounding him can get annoying and be a turn off. I’m just a very extroverted and vocal person. I’d be ok if he’d bottom, but that takes work too on his part. Well, I’ll figure it out.
Pro
Some people just like a buffet even if they have a favorite comfort food.
Chief
talk to him about how and why this bothers you and what he feels he gets out of it. ultimately therapy (for him or as a couple) may help — my own therapist actually has a specialty in sex addiction (and other addictions) — but it can be confrontational to suggest that off the bat and he has to want it.
Conversation Starter
True, I do check on him sometimes, and we can see each other’s profiles. We tell each other before meeting someone anyway, so I have a good sense regardless. It bothers me mostly in the sense that I’m genuinely concerned for him and don’t think it’s healthy. I don’t want him to do it for me, I want him to do it because it’s the healthy thing to do. But I agree therapy could be a good idea . I’ll DM you
A great resource you could tap into would be your self-respect, sounds like he’s playing games with you. Get a new partner.
There’s addiction to sex (and I agree with SC1 on this one) and addiction to the app itself, which is harmless in some ways but indeed not mentally healthy as you say OP.
My own experience is that when I have spare time or am bored, it’s an issue. Otherwise it’s not. Keep your guy busy! Or find him another job.