Confession: I wish I have the confidence of my straight, white, male coworker.

likefunnysmartupliftinghelpful
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Straight, white, male here with low self confidence. My father died when I was young and my mom basically disappeared my freshman year of college. I made it through school but with a ton of debt. Fast forward 10 years and I’m debt free and very confident in what I do everyday. At some point along the way I decided my own worth and projected that everyday. It wasn’t easy and I still work hard at it. At the end of the day you are in control of working towards the outcome you want.

likefunnyuplifting

Your experience doesn’t matter or count. That’s what they tell me.

This is a dumb post and partly what is wrong with society currently. It’s the victim mentality. You can become confident regardless of your skin color or sexual orientation. Take control of your life and control what you can control. Perfect your craft, exercise, eat healthy, add additional unique skillsets and you will become more confident

likesmartfunnyuplifting

You act like they don’t have a healthy amount of confidence and are acting a victim, but they wished they had the confidence of their *straight, white, male* coworkers which is a different type of arrogance. They could be doing just fine, but society and firm life doesn’t always make space for acknowledging people of different backgrounds and assimilation is more or less rewarded in the field- why do you think 91% (AICPA or Robert half statistics...) of partners are white men?

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Reality check: the person you’re thinking about decided they’re their own best advocate and slowly became that confident. The straight, white, male that you’re not thinking about who’s sheepish, quiet, and nerdy never made that decision.

likefunny

It also comes from their families, teachers, coaches, and peers telling them that then world is at their feet.

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Be confident knowing you’ve proven you can be just as racist, sexist, and bigoted as the worst of them!

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Now that’s a reply I wish I’d written!

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You can have it. It's up to you, not the bad white man.

Att: a first-generation Latino immigrant with a thick accent and far away from being white.

likehelpful

Never said they majority were, I brought it up as a possible explanation to your post

Fake the confidence until it becomes reality

likesmart

I really want to respond to this, but I don’t know how without sounding rude.

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Same 😂

Identity politics is a bullshit way of assigning the stereotype of a group to an individual.

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This is a huge barrier to our joined effort toward harmony and equalization: most minorities do not want (nor deserve) to be defined by the stereotype of a larger group, yet many of the loudest voices seem to think it’s ok to stereotype other groups.

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Straight, white, male here who also has big time imposter syndrome and minimal confidence

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Same here. Was a shy, introverted kid. Domineering mother and quiet dad who were a little bit of social misfits. So I lack confidence and always feel like an outsider. A person’s upbringing really can have long term effects that are difficult to overcome. I can fake it for a while. But it gets exhausting

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I think some of them were fed confidence cornflakes for breakfast as kid. If I could bottle it, I would.

likefunny

Having traditional immigrant Mexican parents, I grow up on the guilttrip conflakes with lecture milk. Not a good way to build confidence lol

Stop comparing yourself to others and finding excuses for why you are not confident.

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Channel your inner Chad and think to yourself, “what is my value add?”

likefunny

#Chadtucket

likefunny

Ha. I think whites men fake it till they make it.

likehelpful

Many of us do. Introverted straight white male with extreme social anxiety here.

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You work at EY and only have one straight, white, male coworker?

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I wish I had their job security.

likefunny

Doesn’t exist much anymore.

likesmart

Everyone’s got battles, but the kindest voice must be your own.

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I have never seen my race as an issue, I am brown and would say that my achievements are due to my work. I worked two jobs to pay for my undergrad, graduated with about 30k of student loans, then went to grad school and got loans to pay for it. I did experience racist at Amazon, my third manager was white, he would make off comments about a teammate Chinese accent then, he told me that he didn’t feel comfortable putting me in front of executives because of my accent. But that didn’t stop me from advancing, you can’t let other control your success

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As a gay white male, I breathed a sigh of relief 🧘‍♂️

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I was going to write something constructive until I got to racist/bigoted part. You are what’s wrong with our society

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Mindy Kaling says this in an interview (that this is her confidence level). 🤣

But yea as long as you have the skills, fake that confidence until you believe in yourself just as much.

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