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Idk, “the residents girlfriend is quite often never the doctors wife”. If you want to pursue it, go ahead as that’s your choice, however I wouldn’t place all my eggs in one basket. Continue to multiple date and keep your options open.
This is just in my honest opinion, if the communication is already low due to his schedule and you already live in the same state, then I wouldn’t pursue.
He likely just doesn’t have time to dedicate to responding (& I wouldn’t necessarily put this in the “if he wanted to he would” category). He may be interested but just has to prioritize rest…? Residency is hard and hard on the people, they can suffer from depression etc. If you’re interested then see if you can gauge where his head is, a lot can happen in 6 months, maybe you’ll want to move too but like someone else said, keep your options open.
In terms of the rationale for being on an app, it’s an easier way to find a FWB.
Residents are ALWAYS busy and can work upwards of 80 hours per week. What’s his specialty & what year? If he are making time for you he is interested- it’s worth seeing what’s up- unless you aren’t interested
He's general surgery. I'm a bit concerned about the lack of communication. It's very sporadic. It's giving uninterested even though he says he is. I understand he's super busy though. And wouldn't ever want to make someone feel bad for pursuing their dreams. I guess I'm just a bit confused why he was on a dating app to begin with if his schedule was so full and he plans to move. How do you even have time to get to know someone? But I'm super picky and rarely find someone I like so I want to see where it goes. I just want to be smart and not set myself up for heartbreak later down the road.
Hey OP, what happened???
Best thing you can do is just be upfront ask him what are his intentions and/or if he’s dating anyone. What are his expectations of this if he has any. If not let it play out. I also ask what year. Residents have a research that they also have to complete in addition to other things and that takes up time. I suggest just asking the questions you want to know so you won’t waste time.
He's doing a special fellowship following residency. So he's done with residency but is doing additional specialized training.
And you're absolutely right. I need to just ask. It feels a bit too soon but maybe I'm just overthinking. I think asking will ensure we're on the same page. Thank you all for your feedback!
Never been interested in dating an MD. I grew up with one. My father. Always super busy and not the lifestyle I wanted for my kids. Buuuuuut at least he can spend time with his grandkids now!
Yes, you should ask about his intentions. Not only that, but about his past dating life. Ask if he's seeing others, too. When was his last relationship. Did he have a girlfriend in undergrad or high school and what happened there. I know most folk say it's too much but it will give you very good perspective on who he is and where you may stand. Men will often get with exes or friends that they never were able to pursue once they are established.
Ask yourself the following: What are you looking for? Are you open to relocating? Are you open to long distance? Where and how do you envision yourself in a relationship? What do you need to grow a relationship? What’s your communication style? Once you know what you want and need in a relationship, you’ll be able to assess if this relationship is the right fit for you.
No harm in a second date.