I just had my baby girl, and I’m so incredibly grateful — but breastfeeding is really taking a toll on me. It feels brutal. I’m exhausted and still struggling with the nipple pain. I’m trying so hard to breastfeed and pump, but sometimes I give her some formula so I can get a little rest. I’m not sure how to handle such situation.

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Don’t feel bad for giving formula and try to rest as much as you can! I have two kids and honestly regret not giving them bottles to supplement breast milk. They’re both exclusively breastfed and after a few months wouldn’t even try a bottle. They hated the taste of formula as they’re so used to breast milk. It’s very hard when I returned to work and they wouldn’t take any formula. They don’t like cows milk either when they become toddlers.

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It’s truly brutal and in my opinion, one of the hardest parts of being a mom. Please don’t feel bad supplementing with formula or pumped bottle feed so you can have a break. You need to be well rested as much as you can so you can give your best to your baby.

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Stopped trying to breast feed within 3 weeks of having my baby. My milk never came. I tried everything under the son - horrible brews to drink, massage, eating ridiculous supplements, pumping atleast 8 times a day. Trying to latch baby every time she was hungry. My body was not having it. My nipples were raw and I couldn’t even stand the thought of bringing my daughter close to my body honestly.
My OBGyn had to have a conversation with me and ask me to stop torturing myself as I slipped rapidly into post partum depression. A lot of it driven by my lack of being able to breastfeed and feeling useless as a new mom. There were swathes of days I don’t remember anymore and everyday it felt like I was not really useful for my daughter.

Once I stopped trying to breastfeed and force my body to do something it didn’t want to, I felt a tad bit better. But the mom guilt piled on. It took months of therapy, support from my partner and going back to work that helped me just get over it and focus on my daughter.
If it’s not working out, just don’t do it. Your baby will love you the same. Formula was made for this reason. I currently have a healthy almost 10 month old.

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Oh momma. I feel you, it's so hard adjusting when the reality is different than our expectations.

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Do not feel bad for supplementing!!! Remember a fed baby is the best baby and a healthy momma is the key to a healthy family. My milk was never enough for my little guy; we supplemented every feed. Initially, I was trying so hard to pump and “make enough” for his needs. But it just never happened.

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I stopped breastfeeding my first at 6 weeks when I got mastitis. It was honestly the best decision I could have made. My daughter was just fine on formula, and I became a way better mom because I wasn’t so exhausted from trying to breastfeed and pump so much.

Do whatever works for you. That could mean continuing full force ahead, could mean cutting back to nursing only first thing in the morning and maybe overnight, or going 100% formula.

I didn’t end up breastfeeding my second at all. He was a NICU baby for blood sugar reasons and then I was hospitalized for postpartum pre-eclampsia. Both of my children have done just fine (now 4.5 and 2.5).

Just give formula ❤️ your health is more important than breastmilk. We have amazing formula alternatives that grow beautiful, healthy, incredible babies. (My baby is on Nutramigen since 3 weeks old and he’s amazing, 2.5 years old now)

Completely agree with everyone else if formula is what works for you. Just to give a different option: if you have nipple pain see a lactation consultant / breastfeeding mentor. It shouldn’t hurt. I had pain with my first, got some advice on my positioning and the pain went completely transforming my experience and I kept up feeding for over a year. You are doing really well, feeding a baby is tough whatever option you choose, be kind to yourself

Why the need to breast feed and pump? With my first I was obsessed with trying to build up a big stash that I made it way harder on myself than needed. Having to wash pump parts on top of taking care of a newborn is just too much IMO. So consider if it's really necessary.

Also, it shouldn't be painful. I would consider seeing a lactation consultant to trouble shoot why it's painful.

Don't feel bad about giving formula, fed is best. Especially if it gives you some sanity.

As the saying goes, sleep when baby sleeps. Even if that means taking a nap at 6pm, the 4am version of you will thank you. Any extra rest will help you get through this newborn phase. Let the dishes sit, vacuum in a few weeks, get some takeout delivered.

Lastly momma, you are doing great! You've got this!

The nipple pain does get better over time — mostly by 8 weeks and almost all the way by 12 weeks for me. Mother Love Nipple Cream is my favorite, and a lactation consultant also recommended using it to lubricate the flanges of my pump, which helped a lot. It also helped when I learned pumping shouldn’t hurt — you can turn down your suction if it does to see if that helps.

And for real, echoing everyone else: don’t feel bad supplementing or switching to formula if and when it’s right for you. Your rest and mental health are more important. Baby gets the benefits of breastfeeding even if you’re supplementing, and the most important thing is that she has you there for her, so take care of yourself!

Going to add - make sure you're using the correct size flanges too!

*big hug*

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