I keep getting tapped to do all the “office mom” stuff like organize team dinners, onboard the interns, remember everyone’s birthdays, pick out client gifts. None of this is in my job description, and surprise surprise, the guys on my team never get asked. I’m worried that if I push back, I’ll look unhelpful or not a “team player,” but honestly, I’m tired of the invisible labor. Would you play along to stay in good graces?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

I’d instead delegate each task to someone else very publicly. “You know I can’t do that right now as I lack the bandwidth but I bet John can take care of that! You should ask him.” If they refuse you should delegate it to the receptionist or your firm’s runner or intern.

And more importantly if you aren’t otherwise in love with this job try your best to find another one and stick it out until you do. Hang in there! This is incredibly sexist.

like

Terrible advice. Do NOT publicly delegate to other people and put them on the spot like that (“I bet John can do it!”). Only do this if you’ve already confirmed that they can do it.

like

You have a job description?

likefunny

Why not couch a discussion in terms of delegating to the office manager these tasks or if one doesn’t exist, an excellent opportunity to hire a new admin assistant?

like

Also bring up how it is affecting your ability to bill. At the end of the day, for the partners, that is the first priority.

like

Maybe you can preface it with you know no one is intentionally doing this but subconsciously you believe you’re being asked all the time because you are a woman and in the future you’d greatly appreciate if there can be a rotation of these kind of tasks. Or leave out the start and just go with the latter. I don’t think asking my for a rotation is unhelpful or not being a team player because you’re not saying no to it just that these should be shared responsibilities.

like

It’s totally valid to feel drained by this kind of invisible labor—it adds up and often goes unnoticed. One thing that helps is tracking where your time actually goes and presenting it clearly when the load feels uneven. Just like how you can calculate warp luck to evaluate odds and outcomes, assessing your effort helps clarify what’s fair. You can try tools like calculate warp luck (https://www.hsr-warp-calculator.online/) to get a clearer perspective.

This happened to me once and I privately talked to my practice group chair about it and it never happened again.

Related Posts

Looking for advice on business trips. My boss kindly asked me if I want to go meet a client out of state along with business folks. It will be my first visit to a client. What do you think are the benefits of these trips? I’m fairly new in my career and in-house so would appreciate any thoughts. Thanks!

like

If this deal flared up my IBS and I keep having to run to the restroom, do I bill the client for that time or nah? (Yes, I’m thinking about the deal. Yes, I’m posting this from where you think I am.)

likefunnyuplifting

Negotiating a settlement. I’m at $10k, opposing counsel is at $20k. My client won’t go higher than $15k. OC has come down to 17.5k and says his client won’t budge from that. Do I offer 12.5k so we can hopefully meet in the middle at 15k? Is that how the settlement game is played? Seems dumb we can’t just say let’s meet in the middle now and be done with this. (I’m a first year, first time negotiating a settlement on my own and I don’t want to screw this up!)

like

Please evaluate possible comp package for project manager role
175-185 base
20% -25% bonus
200-250 RSU over 4 years
11 years of experience with a masters

like

Hello friends,
I wanted to share that I am in my first job as ui/ux expert and I am the only ux/ui person in the team. I am expected to take care of entire research and design of the product. It becomes very overwhelming as the product that I am working on is in a early phase and I am expected to think about ui as well as ux and also design entire app on my own.There is no user interview or user testing happening as my project manager thinks it can be done after product is launched. Please help!

like

#Capgemini is hiring
email me:
ranjithmgj@gmail.com with code for referrals

961661-Junior Scrum Master
1164963-Scrum Masters
1094856-Agile Coaches
945628 - Project Manager

Location - Pune/Hyderabad/Chennai

5 years experienced.

like

Are chiropractor visits to fix my back after the client threw me under the bus covered with workers comp?

funnylike

I have a team that just completed an audit, on time, on budget, resulting in a happy client which makes me a happy partner!

There is often a lot of negativity on this site, but I just wanted to give

likeupliftingfunny

Why are there so many Private Client Advisor positions/ Private client Banker positions open?

like

Where is the sustainability sector headed in the Middle East, project wise?

like

got email some days back. “We are pleased to have you join us at IBM and I welcome you to the IBM Client Innovation Center”. is cic different than gbs? where are our locations in india?

like

Can someone help me on what should one ask for B8 position for project management having 8 years of experience .

like

Anyone have insight on Neurocrine Biosciences as an employer or as a client? Got an offer for their Market Access team and all looks great....just can't get a read on culture

like

Hi All, I joined Coforge 2 weeks ago and was directly assigned Santander project, but yet to get work. I connected with one of RDG member and they told me to wait. Any ideas on how much time it takes to get work here?. I am bored now 😑.Coforge Coforge ltd

like

Does anyone have any side gigs or know of any gig types for project managers? Projects themselves need too much attention to manage on the side of our already busy days.

Hi, Is it good to join Salesforce for Technical Consultant role (YOE - 3.2 years) ?
I checked with few of my connections, they saying I will be mostly allocated to Salesforce industries (Vlocity) project. Please suggest about the team structure and work life balance for this role.
and also in future, is it possible to apply for IJP in Salesforce ?

Please provide your thoughts on this.
Thanks

Salesforce

like

Hello LTItes, i joined LTI a month back.
I attended a client interview last week and was selected for the same. Now they are asking to join within a day or two. I'm having my mom's surgery this week. How to safely refuse to join this client project for at least 10 days. I can't take leave for 10 days.
Can anyone please help me with this? I'm confused and scared.

Thanks

like

Hi fishes,

I had my 2nd round yesterday at persistent systems
They are offering me project lead role.
How much should I negotiate for?
Location Pune
YOE 11
Tech cloud

Also what is the average annual hike at persistent?

like

Interviewing client side for the first time, what are some good questions to ask that one might not think about at an agency?

like

More Posts

Hi fish,
Planning a trip to Thailand for 1-2 weeks next February. Suggestions on where to stay (cities, parts of town, specific hotels), activities, where to fly into etc. Thank you!

like

Hiring urgently!!!
There is a requirement of unix & C/C++ developer role. If interested please dm me.
Exp: 2 to 6 years
NP: Max 60 days
location: Mumbai/Thane

like

After you interview for a job is it acceptable to contact your interviewer on Linked in or is that like stalking? I don’t have another contact and I want to follow up with them but I don’t want to be annoying.

likesmartfunny

I’m the only PM in my company. We work with custom automation in Michigan. I’m a recent graduate in mechanical engineering but I have 6+ in business and a degree on it. My question is, is 60k too little? Some of my friends are telling me that I was lowballed.

like

I have a virtual interview with Tesla tomorrow for an internship position. What should I wear? This would be first internship, so I’ve never interviewed for a position like this and am not sure how to dress (especially given it’s virtual). Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

like

I’m a man and I can’t finish during sex. I’m in the beginnings of a relationship and I don’t know how to be honest about it. Right now I’m just faking it, but it’s stressful and or sucks. Has anyone had this issue or dealt with it in the relationship? No jokes please...

like

Whatever you do don’t turn on networking...

funnylike

EYGDS vs Deloitte USI - which one is better for US taxation teams

like

Anyone know of a good directory of high quality, design-focused printers (in the US)? Seems most agencies/designers don’t shout out their print vendor in the credits.
Used to use FPO’s blog to find good printers - but it’s been a minute since I’ve done any premium print work.
Specifically looking for printers specializing in packaging. THANK YOU 🙏🏻🙏🏻

like

Surely I’d be a fool to pass on such a lucrative pre-approval, right?

Post Photo
funnylikehelpful

Any other challenges out there for Southwest beyond United? I'm A list preferred on Southwest and possibly looking to make the switch.

like

So anyone Opting In??

like

[Weekend Wines] what’re you drinking?

Post Photo
like

Does anybody know anything about Huge in Chicago? Their reviews online are shitty—but they could be from bitter employees. Just want to know if the agency is worth me moving cities for.

Wow. I finally got a standing desk and it is LIFE changing 🫶

like

Any copywriting fishies interested in teaming up for the young lions competition?

Is there an appropriate way to turn down an assignment because it is non-billable? Two of the partners I work for keep asking me to write client bulletins and articles with them, which is great, but now I’m starting to worry about meeting my billable hours requirement.

like

How do you deal with a team who only takes action when they have gotten the cosign from white counterpart? I.e. Maybe place a tag ...no action. White counterpart, I agree we should place a tag 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

like

Can anybody tell me does BOSCH support buyout option? Should a candidate serve 3 months of notice period strictly?

like

Additional Posts in Law

I am concerned with fulfilling billable hours requirement. I’m required to hit 2100 hours yearly and I’m at ~1,500 hours and I think I’ll hit 150-180hours this month. What will happen if I don’t hit my targeted amount by the end of my year.

likehelpful

What is the expectation at your firms about coming into work after making your billable hours requirement? Asking especially for those who do not get a bonus per extra hour billed over the minimum.

like

Probably a foolish question: are bonuses based off of raw billable hours or billable hours modified by the partners?

like

I am lead counsel on a case - we’re suing 3 businesses and my supervisor is a named incorporator of one of the businesses although he is not an officer. He is asking me to bring the file and meet with him about the progress of the case. I reminded him of the conflict and he stated that the conflict was resolved because he also has a claim against 1 of the companies that he recently filed separately. I don’t see how that resolved the conflict…and he’s fully pressuring me to meet. How to respond?

like

What do you do when you feel the goalpost has been/is being moved re: billable requirements? Like there's a spoken vs unspoken? I chose this job based on billables vs salary and what I'm being told I'm expected to do now is 20-30% (at least) > than what was initially agreed upon. Given my other life responsibilities, this is creating a huge strain & I feel like this is slowly getting harder & harder on my spouse & kids. I'm grateful to have lots of good work but not sure how to course correct.

like

Advice on managing up / enduring toxic deal teams? I’m at the point where my stomach drops any time I see something come in from certain people. Everything is behind, client is unhappy, I’m exhausted and simultaneously being micromanaged without guidance on big-picture/substantive issues. I keep trying to tell myself at least this is consulting and the project will be over... eventually...

like

Anyone else here kinda like doing doc review? (In moderation of course)

likehelpful

Any advice on how to deal with a partner/boss who is shifting all responsibility to me with zero guidance, no mentoring, and an unwillingness to discuss the issues? (Small firm, only associate under this partner and have been working at the firm for 2 years). There are an increasing number of passive aggressive comments from the partner who expects to be completely hands off once the case lands on my desk. Wants me to figure it all out despite cases being from different areas of law.

like

For associates who have lateraled in the last 6 months or so, what made you decide to move? Has your situation improved since moving? I’m a transactional mid-level & I’ve interviewed with some great firms recently. I’m struggling to get excited though…it just seems like no matter where I go I’ll be overworked & under appreciated. Hoping there are some positive stories out there to give me hope. Haha

like

A friend was rewatching old episodes of Suits, which admittedly I’ve never seen. The main character starts at this law firm where associates are given cubicles not offices. There’s no way that’s accurate, right??? I have a cube but I’m just a lowly gov atty frm a state school LOL not a Harvard law alum at a reputable NYC firm

like

Is there an appropriate way to turn down an assignment because it is non-billable? Two of the partners I work for keep asking me to write client bulletins and articles with them, which is great, but now I’m starting to worry about meeting my billable hours requirement.

like

What are your outlook organization tips?

Trying to organize my email in a way that makes stuff easy to find. I have folders but how do I make emails both sent and receive easily save to their respective folders (as opposed to dragging each one)

Or any other organization tips for better productivity Iike I just have things organized by matters. Any other categorical suggestions?

like

What do you do about computer problems? It just took me 24 minutes to send a .1 email due to my computer constantly freezing. Is it worth entering that time into non-billable? Or do I just stop whining and work longer to make it up?

like

I'm a long time prosecutor getting into the ID game and billable hours. Are there any resources out there that can help me get more effective/efficient without spending months/years learning the hard way? Some days I'm at the office 10 hours, took virtually no breaks and yet only bill 7. 🤬

like

Best divorce lawyer in NYC?

like

How often do temporary "might-become-permanent" type jobs (at small/mid size firms) actually become permanent?

like

Any insight on working as a staff attorney at Sidley as far as pay, growth, hours, etc.? I had someone reach out to me about a staff attorney role there and just want to hear opinions.

like

I recently had a specialist partner send me a fairly nasty email after I (a transactional first year) was told to ask them to review something ASAP that had clearly been on my partner’s radar for over a week. Why am I taking the (honestly justified) blame for this? Surely it should be obvious that I’m just the messenger here.

like

Thoughts on sending out assignments over the weekend? I work a lot on weekends, but I don’t expect associates too. But, because I work on weekends, I often will send out assignments by email with a clear indication in subject line and body that it does not need to be completed or worked on over the weekend. A friend recently mentioned this isn’t the best since seeing the assignment may create unnecessary stress and anxiety. So, what say you? Am I terrible partner?

like

I am traveling out of town for callback interviews. One firm wants me to commit a full day of interviews. Would it be reasonable to ask for a half day so I can fit 2 callbacks in the same day?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal