Quite the pickle: wife is upset that I keep criticizing her, but she keeps doing legitimately addressable things like leaving the toddler alone around knives

Suggestions?

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You’ll always find something wrong another person is doing - and the more time you spend with them, it will increase. You need to figure out which battles to fight. Kids near knives? Yea, move the knife out of the way and don’t say much. Knife IN the crib? Problem, so address it.

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Believe me, there are a dozen petty things your wife could point out to you but doesn't. Move the knife yourself, and focus more on the big picture. If we get caught up in the details, we will very quickly sour ourselves and our spouse. I agree with the comment above to do your best to ignore for a few weeks and you'll see it starts to lower your stress levels.

likesmart

Agree with the above comments. Just do it for few weeks without criticizing and see if that makes it better.

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Tone it down. Suggest and don't criticize. Show concern and don't complain.

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When it comes to your kids’ safety, there’s no such thing as an illegitimate concern. Be clear that it’s not about her, everyone has blind spots and habits but the important thing is to learn and continuously improve.

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Ugh, I agree with the above but can I just complain here how frustrating that is?? If I mess up in life, work, friendships, sports, etc. I’d like to know that in a calm and constructive manner so I can pinpoint the issue and work on improving.

My wife complains about the same thing, as I often correct her when she’s blatantly wrong and have to take a trust but verify approach because there has been a clear pattern of poor decision making in her life choices, finances and health. When she asks why I always question her, it takes everything in me not to say “because there’s a solid chance you are making a bad decision!” Instead i say some BS about how I’m analytical and want to make sure we consider all options, and want to understand her thinking , etc.

That being said, marriage is about the long game and I have to constantly remind myself to pick my battles and which bills are worth dying on.

Anyways, thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

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My breathing annoys my wife 😆!

funny

Lol depends on the type of knife!

funny

Knew a partner that gave his wife annual performance reviews. I'm honestly shocked that she didn't kill him

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