The associate I’m working with starts every 3rd sentence with I don’t want to tell you how to do your job or some variation of a personal attack. Any advice on how to handle over eager/confident peers? They’ve already made comments to the client about thier role within the project, and it’s getting to a point where I feel like the engagement leader should be getting involved, but they’re hands off in that regards.

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I am assuming you are senior to the associate. If so, the next time they say “I don’t want to tell you how to do your job”, you immediately interrupt them and say “then don’t”. Then move on and tell them what you expect them to do and when you want it done.

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Ask them: You seem to say that a lot. What do you mean by that?

How is “I don’t want to tell you how to do your job”, a personal attack on you?

1. Is the associate more experienced than you in that particular area? If so, it may be worth listening to what they have to say.
2. Can your approach use improvement? If so, listen to what they have to say.
3. Why do you feel threatened by what they may have said to the client? Did they say you report to them or something that’s false?

When I first joined consulting, I had a particular manufacturing industry experience. As a junior hire, I knew more about the client’s manufacturing processes that the SM. They had no problem asking for my POV. Sometimes they agreed and other times they didn’t.

At the end of the day, it costs you nothing to listen. Like M1 said, you don’t have to do what they say, but there’s nothing wrong with asking for their opinion or listening politely to it, even if it’s unsolicited. Seems like you may have a bit of insecurity that needs to be addressed, so you can listen to others’ advice and also stand up for yourself.

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I use “kid” when your decision making model is childish and self centered. When all comments and exchanges are centered around how they get more speak time, or input into the deck (despite being asked to strawman it & utterly failing), or consideration for performance. It’s never about the client, the firm or even the project. FYI they have multiple graduate degrees but less than 3 YOE and zero in our specific field.

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What's the worst possible outcome of doing nothing?

I try to simplify problems. Sometimes this is the quickest way to realize there's not actually that big of a problem. "Kill it quickly" so you don't waste time on it

But yeah, usually we have to do SOMETHING 🤮

Let them dig their own grave. Maintain your own relationships and CYOA, as always. In regards to the snarky comments, as annoying as it is, just brush it off.

At least it’s not the first sentence…

Anyway CYOA and document everything. Is he/she a peer or do you oversee them? If a peer maybe offer some friendly advice/feedback. Like you’re watching out for them so it doesn’t affect their review. But maybe they’re too immature to receive it.

Oversee, though they def have an opinion about that

^I can get on board with this

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