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I don't know your backstory or if I'm reading into this a bit too far, but it could generally apply to anyone.
Regardless if you identify as the "odd good" as I do, or not, the greatest relationship successes I've seen or have been a part of is when people simply focus on what makes themselves happy (at first). Spend less time on dating and more time on what else makes you happy, the former hopefully follows.
I don't care if your hobby is bowling, billiards, D&D, rock climbing or tabulating the number of pieces & brands of gum on the wall at Pike Place Market, whatever it is, it doesn't matter. There will always be a potential social group out there for you so go join it. Being quintessential "you" pays dividends in the long run. (This cannot be construed as legal advice, do not do anything illegal, especially you street racers and late night HOA landscaping violators.)
Doing what you enjoy provides intrinsic motivation to continue, commonly leading to improvement, which can inspire confidence. Your social group leads to personal and interpersonal growth and when you find someone you're able to introduce and integrate them into a world of which they know nothing and you are the SME. Excitement for you both. Hopefully potential partners can do the same in turn and you are both better for being introduced to new experiences and relationships.
If you find somebody within that hobby/social-group then you have something that makes you both happy in your individual time that can also be shared together.
This is soo good!
You're not doing anything wrong, OP and outside of leaving or getting married I doubt there's much you can do in the "working on yourself" area to improve the situation. IMHO, Seattle is the second worst city in the country for men to date (after San Francisco). Gender imbalance + passive aggressiveness + uncertainty about gender roles + extreme wokeness and intolerance is a tough combination.
are you M or F? It's hard for Men here
Hi gentlemen, not sure if this will help but as a female who had a run with the Seattle dating scene haha, what I notice often is that men are quite insecure and/or not confident enough to come up to a woman and ask her out. I know that there’s a chance you will be rejected, but that is one of the most attractive things you can do. Also, this might sound like cliche advice but I assure you that 95% of men don’t do it. If you like a woman (especially if she’s closer or over 30): invite her out. Instead of saying:”maybe we should hang out”, be specific: “ I like you and I would like to invite you to _ restaurant at _time on _date. Please let me know and I’ll send an Uber to pick you up”. Boom! She’s yours. Let me know how that goes😉
It is hard for females too. I already gave up after I dated a couple of times in the past three months. Although there are much more males than females here, it doesn't make anything easier. Most of the guys I dated worked in tech companies who are lacking basic common senses and social norms. I have never seen so many guys being overconfident and waiting for girls to pay the whole bill for the first date. I am shocked that there are a lot of phd tech guys still living with their moms because they don't know how to do housework. Where are the normal guys？Thinking of moving back home to Texas. Don't want to die alone and be single forever here.
I feel like people in Seattle (male or female) all look for the same outdoorsy and active type cause they’re influenced by the environment - but it doesn’t lead to good relationships
Why do you say that?
TC?
HAHAHAH this made me giggle.
I agree with you, it's been tough finding someone that I actually have chemistry with