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Ok so while I am the furthest thing from a professional, I can say that I JUST went through a phase of this. My son (20 months) is the sweetest thing ever with adults, but started hitting the kids in daycare. I was devastated! Like this was my worst fear with having a little boy. But then I asked the teacher if he could move up into the slightly older group (he honestly seemed antsy and bored with the activities), so now he’s one of the youngest in his group. And he just magically stopped hitting! Perhaps your kid is experiencing a similar thing? Just noting bc you said he’s the oldest one there now.
Good luck! Don’t beat yourself up about it. He’s 2 ;)
My son (2yo) went through a hitting/biting mom phase and the thing that worked for us (asked ped for opts) was have no reaction. For biting, Stop whatever y’all are doing and simply walk away. No reaction, just put them down and walk away. He got tired of the “game” he thought he was playing and rarely bites anymore. When he hits me I try to recognize his feelings “I see you might be frustrated.. it’s okay to be frustrated but we don’t hit. You can stomp on the ground.” Then set him on floor to stomp. I love following @BigLittleFeeings on insta too.
He doesn’t need a therapist. He’s two. He just needs to learn coping and self soothing skills and that hands are not for hitting.
Feeling so down, I don’t know why I’m being such a “baby” about it, I know it’s not uncommon… 🥲 I know he mimics a lot of others’ behaviors. Im sure he saw other kids do it and he’s doing it. He’s so influence-able. I guess I’m sad my innocent kind good baby is transforming. I do see some traits from my grandfather in him, a veteran who had anger issues. I dunno I’m at a loss and just overthinking everything now. 🥹
The advice I read is “give him something else to hit” “ignore him hitting” “offer distractions” - did that work for you?
I’m usually a positive mom with high energy and tonight I was just livid and sad. And then feeling guilty about that. Like showering him with good behavior and love is not working. So is indifference and low energy going to push him to be even more aggressive? Should I pretend like I’m not upset and nothing happened? Too many questions, would love to talk to a professional maybe…
You’re projecting your past trauma and family trauma onto very normal, age appropriate behaviors
So I’ve been on both sides of this. First as the parent whose kid was hit and then my 2nd was the hitter. It’s most definitely that he’s bored and it’s time to move up. My hitter almost always started hitting or doing naughty things when he’d mentally, emotionally, socially had outgrown his class. He eventually stopped but we just spoke to the director and continued reiterating “gentle hands/hands are not for hitting”.