How do I set realistic expectations for myself? I either wildly overestimate what I can do in a day...or get paralyzed by the fear of falling short.

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Make a to-do list and then rearrange it in order of priority and due date. That gives you a starting point for what is first.

I used to wait till the day something was due to start it because I needed the panic to do it.
Now I try to make myself work on it a day BEFORE I think I need to start, schedule permitting. That gives me a buffer on time if I underestimated how long it’ll take.

When I’m asked when something can be back to someone, I add a day into my calculations so I have that buffer.

I never promise more than 2 deliverables in a single day, I just have system failure at that point. Too much pressure and too much juggling needed. I might deliver more than 2 that day, but I don’t say I will.

This week I have 9 due outs.

Four are reviews, two are proposals, one is a reconciliation, one is a training document, and one is an invoice that needs to get out the door.
Someone on Monday wanted a new deliverable (the training) done by Thursday. I was honest and said I had too much due this week and could try to start it on Friday afternoon and try to wrap up Monday. I plan to start it Thursday afternoon and wrap up on Friday. But if I don’t because I estimated wrong, I’m still ok.

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I definitely don’t 🙃 but I am happy to hear they do exist and happy for you!!! (And also still jealous hahah)

Is your paralysis due to setting expectations that are too high?

I find that if I get really myopic - look ahead just one day at a time - and set aside 2-3 hours per day to hyper focus on this one goal- I can be more productive. Put it on the calendar and get an accountability buddy if needed to hold you to the time slot.

If your role is admin assistant perhaps you can work with your boss to schedule your time such that some is deep focus and other times are for more reactive tasks that I know admins can get burdened with at times.

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I’m also terrible at this. What I do is have two to do lists with work and life stuff. Then break it down by what ‘I have to do,’ ‘what I should do,’ what I want to do.’

Never complete the lists but I go back and forth between the fun stuff and the boring stuff

smart

I'm also terrible at this - what has gotten me closest is:
1. Break tasks down into small pieces (basically where each step is something I could delegate)
2. Estimate the time each will need
3. Apply multipliers: if I've never done it before I multiply by 3, otherwise by 1.5-2 depending on how functional I'm feeling that day
4. Try to track how close I was - this has taught me that i'm much less accurate on estimates for certain types of tasks, which I can try to adjust for the next time I do step 2

I've done most of the suggestions and techniques mentuoned here without much success until starting medication. Afterwards, i would usually get all I planned to get done in a day and felt really good, and this helped my anxiety immensely, which improved my sleep, which helped my anxiety even more

Not saying the above techniques won't work, but id have 5 planners and 8 lists and id remake a priority list everyday and same thing would happen...I don't do it and reorganize it the next day except its more daunting and unrealistic lol

Can confirm I’m on medication but I still needed a system to help the paralysis I get at the beginning of the day

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