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I’ve been married for 18 months and have lived away from my husband ever since because of visa issues. It’s tough, very tough but I’m just glad we live in the age of video calls and good internet. We are timezones apart (US and India) too and it sucks... but if you love your SO, you can fight the distance.
1. We follow a schedule for video calls. Always make time for that
2. We plan vacations in advance so that there’s something to look forward to always
3. We are very expressive and good communication has kept us going
Take your consulting profession as a blessing in this situation. Instead of flying back to your base city on Thursdays, fly out to wherever she lives (assuming that you both are in States). If your partner or HR has a problem with this, tell them that this is going to be your base city for the project
If you don’t fly mon-thu (thats awesome), you guys can alternate. One weekend she flies, the other you. I know couples who have done this. Feels odd, but hey whatever works.
I was in long distance relationship with my now husband then bf for 6 years (US and India). Was a student here while he was working. We were not even engaged at that time. We got married after that. If we can do - anyone can. good luck!!.. 💕❤️
Hats off to you! This is inspiring....
Me and my fiancé, (now married for 16 years) did long distance relationship in the era (2000 to 2003) of very limited internet and 33 cents a minute India call.
It can be done but need trust and communication from both sides. As others have suggested since you are in same country, plan to meet atleast once a month.
Just adding my story here as well. Did a long distance of US-India with my then GF now wife. We talked regularly but had our own space as well. I got hit on here multiple times but stayed loyal, so it’s not impossible if you remember what you have in life. We talked a lot but because we wanted to, not because we had to.
One of the most important things I learnt was about trust. All you can do is trust and expect both of you to be adults with the understanding that actions have consequences. You can’t keep doubting each other but trust that they’ll do the right thing and if they don’t, well... better over now than after 10 years of being married.
Good luck!
My husband and I got married last year but have dated for 7 years, 5 of which were long distance. I’m finally moving back with him this October. It was tough but we were tougher. What worked for us was finding ways to stay in touch via text, schedule some time to talk everyday if possible and travel every month. What kept it sane was that we had our own independent lives that were great and I hope to continue having an independent life (friends, priorities, workout) even when we move back in. And we somehow keep getting stronger everyday.
I have been in long distance relationships and it was really tough in all of them. The most significant being my marriage which ended in divorce - but not exactly due to the long distance bit. Sometimes distance tells you quite a lot about the strength of your relationship, whether its weak or long lasting. Its great to hear stories of people overcoming the distance and the fact that it made their relationship stronger. I had a difference experience. I see a lot of people here talk about trust as if everyone is trustworthy, and you just need to kill your instincts - I definitely do not believe in this. I got to know my ex was lying and using distance as an excuse to hide stuff from me. Trust needs to be earned through model behaviour. After our engagement, we were still separated due to work in different cities. It did result in a lot of fights, incompatibility issues and ultimately in a short marriage that ended in divorce. My lesson from this was that it it actually matters to be with the right person, whether its long distance or under the same roof. That said, given my past, I feel it would be difficult for me to stay in a long distance relationship for a long duration, and that in the future, I would ensure that I make an effort towards staying together, giving preference to personal life for this critical period if possible and sensible from a work perspective. There is no substitute for living together under the same roof, when it comes to knowing a person. Long distance relationships can give the impression that you both long for each other and miss each other, and creates short term happy memories when you meet over weekends or short holidays - even if it is with the wrong person.
how about discussing moving to the same city?