How long do you think you'd need to be with someone before you'd be willing to move across the country for them? I ask because I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and were talking about marriage, but I was just offered an amazing job opportunity in New York. My boyfriend isn't sure about quitting his job, which pays about half what I earn. I know I don't want a long distance relationship, so if he doesn't get on board with the move, we'll have to break up.

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Have you guys ever discussed the move to New York or visited there together? Was he aware you were interviewing for jobs out there? Across the country is a big move so curious how long this has been on the horizon for you and how long he’s known for.

In this economy, I understand why he may not want to quit with nothing lined up, but is he interested in trying to move? Are you amendable to doing it for a few months while he looks for something? How does he feel about long distance? Do you know why he doesn’t want to quit his job? Is there any chance his company would let him be remote for a transition period?

I know multiple people who were married and one person moved to NYC solo while the other person stayed back and they did long distance in the short term. No one really wants a long distance relationship, but it’s a compromise many couples go through for this very reason. Missing a ton of context here, but for what it’s worth, if you’re not willing to do long distance for at least a short period I’m not sure this relationship is built to last anyways. Long distance is a blip on the radar compared to what other challenges you’ll face as a long term couple.

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You read that right did I stutter no? Wake up.

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How old are you guys

I made that type of move after a year together. Still together 15 years later.

Following because I’m in a similar situation.

How do you know he’s not cheating on you already with a side chick? Long distance relationships are only for the strong minded. If you can’t hack it.

what the hell

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It depends on job opportunities in the new city. I wouldn’t move to a small town, but I would to NYC. Have you guys talked about long term goals- where you want to live, if you want kids and how to raise them, etc

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