Related Posts
Chief
Conversation Starter
How can I make friends in Chicago?
More Posts
Chief
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
Sign Up to see all discussions
- Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
- Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
- Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
"" is an unusual email domain. If correct, please proceed to the next step
Messaging rates may apply
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Share
Embed this post
Copy and paste embed code on your site
Preview
Download the
Fishbowl app
Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile
Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl
Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl
Messaging rates may apply
Would probably recommend going to therapy. Individual or couples would definitely help. Sometimes people just don’t know how to view situations or issues in a different way and having children can make people shift to overly cautious with everything.
Hey consulting dad, speaking man to man, your wife has a shitload of hormones and won’t be the same person for several years
Your kid is 9 months old? Um you have like two years to go. Welcome to the shit! We’ve all been there. Go ahead and get yourself hardened. Stick with it. Stick with her. This shit gets better. Give her the emotional support she needs BUT draw firm lines that she can establish her hormonal development around. This is normal. You’re fine. I was there…buddy commenting above was there..:you’re there now. Give her everything you can while also establishing firm boundaries. In ten years you’ll be giving this exact same advice
Thanks EY3 - I think it’s likely hormones and the crazy amount of change we’ve gone through over the past two years. I’m the type of person who doesn’t really take stock of my stress / emotions until it’s too late so working with her on establishing lines/boundaries will probably help us.
Few days. We have a 9 month old, and she continues to stress and complain about everything. Not saying I don’t occasionally vent, but I always try to be positive around our son (smiling, making him laugh, etc.).
Long story short I miss the woman who was ambitious but open to adventure. Carefree. Now I find her getting angry and frustrated with me because I have trouble continuously going into every single day like it’s a challenge. I’m kind of tired of sitting on our porch every day talking like “thank God we got through today” or “thank God we got through this week”. Over the past few years she has made it seem like every day is a struggle and it’s weighing on me and making me a negative/boring person.
Echo the above - therapy definitely helps. It is a cliche but a marriage needs attention and time for it to flourish like many other things.
One thing we did was write down 5 reasons we wanted to marry our partner in the first place and then 3 things that were an issue in our marriage. The therapist can facilitate these discussions in a non confrontational way and it truly helps.
Best wishes for you
Have you thoguht about maybe taking a sabbatical on top of therapy to focus on your relationship? I did so with my wife and It changed our life! We were able to identify the root of our problems and grow from there!
No judgies, this sounds like my life at times. As others have said, therapy helps, but has to be done consistently and you generally get better at it, even when you feel you don’t need it. Also sounds super simple…but eat clean and exercise for both of you can make a world of a difference, especially if right now you find yourself turning to your substance of choice instead. Good luck, happy to chat if you ever want to.
yall wanna get married.. all the in sickness and in health and all that ish... but can't handle the heat.. Marriage ain't easy, however, you gotta support your spouse when she is going thru ish.. Bearing a baby ain't a joke.. It does all kinds of things to your body. add in the fact that she is s working mother. Mothers feel all kids of guilt leaving their kids in someone else's care to go to work.. Its hell.on their psyche.. Buckle down, chill, take a deep breath and go to work. Be there for her... The word is UNYIELDING... Thats what we men are built for. Take it one day at a time.. Breath... We have all been through this some time or the other
You will be fine.. Cest la vie.. DM me if you want to connect and chat over phone.
For context, married 11yrs.. 5 kids and a miscarriage.. two moves across states.. multicultural marriage.. traveling for work.. We made it work.. But you need to commit.. Hit me up and let's have some therapy
My wife and I went through something similar when our daughter was first born. She ended up being diagnosed with post partum depression. She went through an out-patient program at our local hospital and that helped tremendously. Would she be open to you bringing this up? If not, then I'd go the other route and maybe do couples counseling. If she does have PPD, then the counselor can diagnose her and provide next steps. Good luck, brother. I know it's not easy, but don't give up.
Thanks all - this has felt really supportive and helpful. Much appreciated.