I think my boss is mentally living in 2002. Because when I told him I needed a raise, since my salary wasn’t keeping up with the cost of living, he laughed. Then, once he composed himself, he asked if I was joking, I said no. Then he proceeds to tell me that a $58,000 a year salary is more than enough to live off of. I’m single and live in Memphis, my salary barely covers the rent. What’s my next move here?

That is so out of touch. Cost of living has changed so much, and $58k does not stretch like it used to. Honestly, I would start quietly looking for a new role while you still have this one. A boss who laughs at a raise request is not someone who is going to invest in you.

You should not be asking for a raise “since your salary isn’t keeping up with the cost of living.” If you’re asking for a raise, it should be because you’re providing more value to the company in some way. Because you’ve grown your skills, because you’ve exceeded the expectations they had for you when you were hired, because your responsibilities have changed, because of something else. When costs increase for you due to inflation, they increase for the company as well.

Median household income in Memphis is $51k. For “non-families” (single people living alone or with others) is $38k (according to worldpopulationreview.com, which I know nothing about). So that would indicate that $58k is, in fact, more than enough to live on. But you might have to find a different place to rent, or get some roommates.

Others have said he isn’t qualified to say what you can live on. That’s true - but OP brought it up. If you bring up your personal finances in a conversation with your boss, then he’s entitled to tell you his opinion. Keep it professional. Don’t talk about your personal finances; talk about your value to the company.

New job? That is what I did. I asked for a raise because the housing market doubled (tripled in some neighborhoods) and rent was going up. I would not have qualified. The answer I got was "you do realize that email was your resignation, right?".... UH NO! but that's ok, SEE YA!

It's not his job to determine what is enough to live off of for you. Besides everyone should get a cost of living raise every year.

Honestly the whole 2002 comment I think is unnecessary. Who are you to decide what your boss’s mentality is and what decade it’s from? Do you believe it’s a modern business practice that you present to your employer a list of expenses and they need to match your pay to what you believe your lifestyle should comfortably be?

Because if that’s the case, then it’s not your employer who is out of touch with modern reality, it’s actually you. Plus insulting your boss’s age is not going to give you the upper hand in negotiating a better salary. The only thing that will do that is proof that you have earned it and can complete the additional responsibilities that will be expected of you at a higher pay.

If you have not gone over and above what is expected of you then you’re essentially re-negotiating a salary for the same work you were hired to do and where is that fair for a business. You’re moving the goals posts on them after having committed to getting a set amount of work done. Imagine they did the reverse of that to you - which would work to their benefit - and they now decided to reduce your salary and require the same amount of work.

That would be totally unacceptable for you and likewise it’s totally unacceptable to demand more money for the same amount of work simply because you refuse to manage your own finances better by reducing your expenses.

That depends on what you think his next move would be if he told you that you needed to handle more clients, and you laughed, asked if he was serious or not, and then told him you do more than enough already.

It sounds to me like you are yoked to someone who does not place any value on the work you perform. For that reason, and not because of his offensive behavior, I would do as others have said and look for a job elsewhere. You do not have any job security whatsoever, if he perceives himself as having enough control in this relationship to laugh in your face when you address a personal concern.

It's also incredibly poor management - a person who has been humiliated by their boss and is struggling financially has less bandwidth to address work tasks with, plain and simple. This is why Agile project management focuses on work/life balance and mutual respect - because it's what actually produces the best result for businesses.

TL;DR - Your boss is a dinosaur, get out before a comet hits him and you get caught up in the impact.

Find another job!

The best way is to find a new job, let them match with a better offer (if you want to stay), and if you are not matched or they will promise it sometime in the future, just leave!

Crying about "cost of living" is not a good strategy, talking about your value and comparison of your role on the job market is a bit better. Jumping to the new role is the best (talking from my experience).

As a manager, I’ve heard this same message many times in different forms and it all comes down to this… Your personal choices on spending have nothing to do with the company. If you had a baby or got married or bought a house, car, whatever, that is your choice and your responsibility. If you want more money, you need to express that in terms that are valuable to the company. As an example, if you are the top customer service agent, replacing you may be more costly that giving you a raise and/or a promotion. What have you done to increase your value or performance? What new skills have you developed? What new responsibilities have you taken on? Framing a request for more money with these added values included gives you an opportunity for a business conversation. Please never say something like “I’ve been working here/in this position for x amount of time and would like a raise. Time means nothing. Experience and increased value is all that matters.

There are so many factors left unsaid in your post but after being in the workforce since the early 1980's, let me give you some advise on this topic from experience.
#1 - before you ask for an increase you should research what someone in your profession, in your area, typically makes. You always want to go into a salary negotiation with facts. Find out where you fall in that range. If you are high in the range, you will need to rely on #2.
#2 - Make a list of all the things you have achieved in your job over and above what is expected. Remember, employers only care about themselves, I don't care what they say in their company motto, in their mind YOU ARE REPLACEABLE. So go in and present the facts. "I make $58,000 and according to recent industry reports, someone in this position or one like it, in THIS area is making between $57,000 - $63,000. My last increase was last year (or whenever) and it was 3% (fill in the blankes here) which is X% lower than even the cost of living increase for 2024.
You see what I am getting at. You have to go in with facts of WHY you deserve to get that raise. Present at least 3 examples of where you go above and beyond in your daily work. At this point, if he laughs at you, it is time to start looking for another job. HINT on this one also. NEVER take a job that you are not REALLY happy or even THRILLED with the wage, even if you are unemployed (as I am right now), because often times people take jobs just because they are desperate to get out of a bad situation and money, ANY money, seems great at the time. But believe me once the excitement of finding that job wears off, you are going to be unhappy. Make sure you are happy with the wage that way yearly increases will just be gravy, not something you have to have to live. No company is going to care about you as a person. You are simply filling a seat. They laugh because they know you are replaceable, and they will do it without hesitation. Do your homework. Go in and say, "I know we talked about this once before but I just wanted to share some information with you that I have found since our last discussion." Then present your case. Don't be angry or mad. Be professional. Finish with, "in light of a little more insight, which I should have presented when I first approached you, do you think that I could expect some type of increase and when?" You need to establish a time factor or he might say, "Ok I will look into it." And you never hear about it again. If I were you, I would start looking AND to the presentation to him. That way when you quit, you can give them this to look back on so they won't wonder why. Not that they are going to care, I'm just saying if it were me I would want to have a professional and well-thought-out reason when I resign. I hope this helps you!!!

And they absolutely don’t respect you for people that say that and laugh at your face wow maybe they should be in to bankruptcy themselves and you need to go find an awesome job that respects you and their company

Set a Budget. Learn to live within your means. Don't FINANCE anything. My family of 2 lives on HALF of what your stated salary is. We don't eat out. We have a Mortgage. Own a USED Vehicle. Consume KETO and DASH Diets without the sugar, starches and carbs (processed foods are 4x more $ than fresh made at home). No subscriptions, cable TV, etc., only internet...etc

I recommend first calling out to your maker … and tapping into the spiritual realm of your belief system first …. You should get your answers if your willing to allow your steps to be ordered respectfully of course :)

I would start looking elsewhere. I'm not a millenial or Gen Z (as some seem to assume you are) and laughing at someone for asking for a raise is ridiculous. I'm a single female as well and 58k is not enough to live on today. The problem is older people in power seem to relate things to how they were when they were your age and that is 100% out of touch with reality now.

Get a roommate. It is your responsibility to cover your cost of living, not your employer’s.

I totally disagree. A hard worker is within rights to ask for a raise. A person's amount of bills is no one's business to give the bad advice to cut down on thier household bills. Jobs don't pay enough at the extreme high cost of living. The managers and hire up get paid huge salaries to take expensive vacations at the cost of lower employees. It's a fact. Without the lower end employees that help make thier salaries. Without them higher ups wouldn't have a job. Lower paid workers will continue to leave for other companies that are willing to pay more.

With that approach, I'd have laughed too.

I empathize with how frustrating that experience must have been. That said, I don’t believe employers are obligated to adjust salaries based solely on someone’s personal cost of living—everyone’s situation is different. But I do believe salaries should be fair in the context of the local market.

For instance, I recently saw census data for Shelby County (where Memphis is located) showing it now takes over $55k just to live alone without being rent-burdened. That doesn’t mean every job should automatically pay more, but it does underscore the importance of aligning pay with both market rates and the value an employee brings.

At the end of the day, companies look for a return on what they invest in people. So when asking for a raise, it’s worth knowing and communicating how you contribute to that return. Whether that’s through revenue generation, retention, brand equity, or operational efficiency—define how the company measures value, and then demonstrate how you're moving the needle. That makes for a stronger and more productive conversation than just framing it around personal affordability, even if that’s also a very real issue.

Hey man, I’m really sorry you're going through that. When a boss laughs at a real concern like your salary not keeping up with the cost of living, it says a lot about how out of touch they are—or how little they value the people who work for them.

$58,000 might have gone far in 2002, but today in Memphis, the average rent for a one-bedroom is over $1,100, and monthly expenses (not including rent) are around another $1,100. That’s over $26,000 a year just to cover the basics. And while $58K is slightly above the city’s median income, it still doesn’t stretch far with today’s prices—especially for someone living on a single income.

If your boss can’t even acknowledge that reality, it might be time to start looking around quietly. Updating your resume and checking the job market won’t hurt—worst case, it gives you leverage. Best case, you find a place that respects your work and understands the times we’re actually living in.

Fire the boss.

It sounds like the max for a single person in the Memphis area 38K so you have three options: (1] increase your value with more skills or [2] change careers or [3] change your location to an area with a higher income level for singles.