So look, not trying to be a dick here, but legit, why do people who live in nyc always give off the vibe that they’re so proud of themselves? Like they’ve accomplishing something just by being there. I’ve lived in huge American cities before but never felt compelled to aggressively pat myself on the back just for signing an overpriced lease. It’s a great place and all, don’t get me wrong, no need to get defensive, but come oooooon, really? Just curios that’s all :)

Anytime someone starts a sentence with “not trying to be a dick, but...” or “not being rude but...”
99% of the time, yeah they’re about to do just that or insult you.

There is quite literally no other city that compares to NYC in the US. No matter what Chicagoans, SFers, or LAers tell you. It’s intense and competitive both professionally and personally, a financial success to be able to afford to live here, and to make it here means you have grit that many don’t.

We don’t think anything about you. There is so much happening that you really don’t enter our minds at all. What you are sensing is a reflection of your own perception of reality and the universe, subconsciously processing what it means to live in a “huge american city” and when you see a NYer, you are probably projecting what you think they are thinking. It’s kind of like that term BDE that was going around: This person seems normal but there’s something about him I can’t quite figure out. A powerful confidence and worldly presence. That’s what you gain from living here, squeezing onto the subway with 100s of people, living in 400sq ft, walking down the street to the Moma or the Lincoln center. It is not an American city, it is an international city.
Hope that helps. (Don’t get me started!)

Nobody actually born and raised in NYC thinks this way.

You’ve obviously never lived there. Surviving in that city is something to be proud of. When you’re there literally no other place in the world exists.

I’m loling at every comment here so hard—all essentially lending credence to what OP just said. There are over 8 million people living in NY. No, they’re not all the best of the best gritmasters who fought their way to be here tooth and nail while conquering their respective industry. There’s plenty of mediocrity in NYC.

I will say, having lived here a while, that New York is generally a bit more competitive and fast paced than other markets because a lot of people want to live here. The cost of living is high, but you’ll also likely get paid a bit more. It’s definitely the cultural epicenter of the US, so if nightlife/performances/restaurants are your thing—and you’re willing to sacrifice your standard of life to have that available—then you’ll probably like it here.

But Jesus Christ everybody, there’s plenty of great talent outside of New York. Some people want to have a back yard and dogs and shit or they want to live somewhere sunny and not have to ride the subway. It’s not like everybody that doesn’t choose to live in NYC “just can’t cut it.”

What a bunch on insecure sanctimonious nerds.

Because we’re better than you.

I was born a New Yorker, grew up in the suburbs, and now live in the city. Taking the emotion out of it, NYC residents need to pay more out of their paychecks to live in the city. We pay federal, high state and local taxes unlike most of America. Also, it’s a high cost of living city. I go grocery shopping and routinely spend over $100. I live in a 500ft apt and no way in hell can I afford a car. Don’t ask how much I pay in rent for a studio. If I lived in a mid-sized city I could have my own 3 bedroom house.

Let’s put the emotion back in. Sinatra said it best “if I can make it there I’ll make it anywhere.” This line still stands true. NYC is a difficult city to live in. Only the top .01% have personal space and everyone else lives on top of each other.

Pre-covid, the city never slept. Cars honk at all hours. Loud Subways roll by shaking the ground 24/7. Lots of opportunities to feed your vices. Bars are open 23/7, big and small concerts every day of the week. Have a stressful day at the office? A bar within walking distance will always be there for an unhealthy release. It takes real discipline not to go off the wagon here.

As Jay-Z + Beyoncé said: it’s a concrete jungle where dreams are made of. This still stands true to a certain extent. Lots of top artists come out of NYC and move to LA. New Yorkers share a collective struggle that I believe is different than anywhere else in the world.

I just left NYC (Bushwick) I ain’t buyin’ it! It’s crowded and dirty and it never fails to disappoint. Sure, the place has a unique vibe (my street had gangsta’s rollin’ down it blasting Lil Baby or Tory Lanez) but honestly, everyone I met there talked about how they wanted to get out. It’s expensive, the food sucks, it’s frickin’ hot in summer, the beaches suck, driving sucks. Sorry NYers but I moved to Miami and don’t miss the place at all.

There are no huge American cities that rival the living and working conditions of New York

I mean, you are trying to be dick, but whatever. NYC is cool but people who make it their whole personality are lame af, I don’t care if you’re from here or not.

And honestly, some of these replies (it’s like the whole city is out to get you, you need grit to make it here), come on, get over yourself, no it isn’t, we work in advertising.

You guys are so cool. I can’t even. Go on with your bad selves :)

Ha OP is worried we’d get defensive - about an opinion from someone who’s never lived here. That’s cute.

I always made fun of NY before I lived here. They think it’s better for sports when their teams are good. They think they’re smarter and more worldly. And that they have the best of everything.

That part is ridiculous. But what I think everyone who lives here for a while gets used to the scale of it. Every major brand has a headquarters here. There is money from Wall Street. People come to open restaurants or perform on Broadway. You see celebrities all the time.


There are only a few cities in the world that have as much of everything as NY does. You just get used to it. And expect it. And everything else feels smaller and slower (and more livable) by comparison. It’s the culture of the city. You get jaded. Or maybe better- your expectations get raised on everything.

In the US, only LA approaches that but it’s more spread out so less intense. And people seem to be too.

London is amazing- but is also more spread out. Paris is sort of similar. Shanghai has it too. I’m sure there are more that I’m not as familiar with.

Another way to look at it is this: Really understanding NYC is a skill, an achievement and something that makes certain people feel interesting and proud and accomplished. Like speaking multiple languages, playing an instrument, being a wine connoisseur, or mastering a sport. Just getting from one part of town to the other during rush hour is satisfying if you do it well. Knowing the opening hours for the museums, the bouncer at a hot club who lets you skip the line, the best place to get breakfast at 3:00 am. These are all little pleasures that make us feel like “insiders”. New Yorkers don’t necessarily think they are better than others or that NYC is a better place to live. They just enjoy playing the game and feel satisfaction that they know the rules.

As another post said - you clearly haven’t lived there... and if you have to ask it’s clear you don’t get it. The challenges are epic, the competition, the inspiration, the access ... it’s the most incredible place to live
Curious where you live?

My parents have lived in the Midwest for 40 years. Previously they were born and bred in nyc, about 25 years. To this day they’ll tell anyone with ears that they’re from New York and ultimately will find a way to make themselves sound better than everyone else. Major eye roll.

I just love the Big Apple. You have to see the Naked Cowboy. What a place!

15 years in NYC. Originally from the West Coast so I don’t call this my “home.” Or pat myself on the back for living here. It’s rough and beautiful and irritating and fascinating, huge and cramped, expensive and cheap, overrated and overhyped, emancipating and infuriating, it’s a
a place of tacit community, overt conflict, racism and classism, but also deep solidarity. And it’s never, ever boring. So I’m going to stay. And I’m glad my 5 year old is a born and bred New Yorker. Maybe in a few years he can better answer your question ;)

NYC is the capital of Earth. “The true New Yorker secretly believes that people living anywhere else have to be, in some sense, kidding.”

– John Updike

Living in NYC for the last six years, I’ve never heard anyone talk about how they’re better than people living elsewhere.

In my experience, the only people who care are people who don’t live here.

Also, not to be rude but it’s usually the people who are scared of NYC or couldn’t cut it here.