Ya'll I forgot about my son's holiday party at school, and I'd promised I'd make cookies for it, and I canceled my lunch meeting to try to get to whole foods and find various treats and then I ran to drop them off and one of the other moms happened to be leaving and she said "Oh, you have an iMPORTANT job, don't you." I always make an effort to bake but I think I must be losing my mind and I just cannot keep up. When will it be over?

First of all, what the other mom said was rude and uncalled for, and frankly says a lot more about her insecurities than it does about you. We're supposed to be building each other up, not trying to knock each other down over little mistakes. Second, you are only HUMAN. Regardless of your profession or level, you are a busy mom who - just like every other mom - forgets things from time to time. Give yourself a little grace and shake off the nasty comment. You did what you could to correct the situation and you'll try harder next time. It's all we can do!

Um, whoever that mom is definitely is projecting. What a b*tch honestly. Who cares if it’s baked at home or at WF. Moms like that are just bringing us all down when we need to be building each other up. Ignore her and continue to bring only WF cookies lol

My advice is not to try to do it all. Don’t pretend to yourself that you can - those expectations are entirely unrealistic. None of us do it all – that’s a fact. We either have help to make things happen so it seems like we’re doing it all, whether from our spouses or people we hire or friends, or we simply don’t do it all. I have older kids – they are 15, 18 and 21 – and I’m really proud of the good job I think I did as a mother while also succeeding professionally. The fact is, though, I never could’ve done it without a lot of help, and I don’t pretend that I did. I bought cookies or I asked a friend to pick up my kid from school or my husband drove to lacrosse practice. So cut yourself some slack – I assume you’re doing the best you can, you’re juggling a LOT, and your kids hopefully feel safe and loved. Good enough.

1. Don’t assume she meant it in a bad way. Maybe she’s genuinely impressed with your job. Don’t know the tone of course but I try to give people benefit of the doubt and don’t let my head interpret it.
2. Woman, you got cookies there on time. Cut yourself some slack. Also how many kids can truly tell the difference between homemade and bought cookies? It’s a cookie! Side note, we cant bake in my kids school due to allergies and all that so store bought treats only.
3. Agree with some of the suggestions - look for opportunities to simplify. I don’t bake cookies for masses; just for us once in a while. I have bday parties at those pre planned jump centers where you just show up. What I do focus on is the things that really matter - time with them, being present for them, doing things they enjoy, etc.

You got this.

My kids are grown but not quite flown. I was very happy when the school district no longer allowed home baked items to be brought to school

I have stopped volunteering at school for things that dont matter to my kids. Your kid wont remember if you baked the cookies. They will remember if you showed when you said you would be there. Focus on making your kids, your family, you happy and f the other moms/adults that will judge your choices.
You’re also much nicer than me - i would have had a retort that likely would have been clear that indeed my job is more important. Dont forget that what you do IS important, and sometimes it requires you to purchase cookies.

What an awful comment. I guess we can pity that lady for seemingly having severe insecurities, it is very unfortunate that she didn’t approach this with empathy.

Sending you a big hug, OP, kudos to you for having a rockstar career AND a family. Many people in live don’t manage to have either.

I would simply say I do. And what’s your important job?

I’m tired of hearing these passive sly commentaries. Put people in their place and move on.

Don’t invest your energy in the people who just want to make you feel like shit for doing your best

You know what, own it. “yes - I have many important jobs. And I’m gettin’ em done.”

I mean. You DO in fact have an important job. Jealousy manifests in weird ways. You brought cookies and showed up at a school - two wins above the rest of us today!!! Hooray and three cheers from your fellow working moms.

Wow are you my younger self? I had these very same debates with myself back in elementary school phase. Middle school was a game changer for me. Give yourself credit. Give yourself grace. That woman meant what she asked. No doubts about it…but shake it off. Outcome was cookies/treats to school. You did it. Take a breather. You deserve that too

That other mom is a total B and jealous of you. There is nothing wrong with buying treats. The kids probably prefer them to whatever homemade crap that woman made.

As a (grown) child of a busy mom, I just want to tell you that you are doing a fabulous job. I hope she didn't make you feel bad. The fact that WHEN you remembered you did everything that you had to do and STILL showed up is so wonderful. Keep going. And ignore that woman's sly commentary. Everything I heard sounds like a mom doing their best who LOVES her child. 💕

I’m the mom who bought cookies instead of baking multiple times. And also heard the comments from other moms, including “well I guess you can’t do it all” (when I showed up with the WF cookies.)

I also figured out what I could do, in my sleep. As in manage the sign-ups, the email lists, the planning behind the scenes. I wasn’t volunteering in class every week, but I was involved.

Some of the same moms said to me, years later, once the kids were in middle school, high school, college… I wish I never gave up my career. I should have tried harder to do both. I admire you.

And my kids are happy, on their way building their own careers.

You are there for your kids. That’s what matters. That’s what they’ll remember.

On your behalf I am officially declaring that we do not care what the other moms think or how they’re judging. I guarantee those kids enjoyed the cookies m the store more than the homemade kind! Those moms, most of ‘em are jealous of the “freedom” your career provides you from baking kid things! . As they’re sitting around sipping on peppermint tea and gossiping your name comes up and they all start saying “wonder what she does…” Some will be intrigued and respect you. Others will be envious and try to drag you down. That’s life. Also, Kids are fleeting. In 15 years time the life you’ve built for yourself and not just your kids will matter more and count for more. You do you. Don’t try to keep up with the non-working Joneses. When kids know they’re loved beyond belief and they feel secure, they won’t care f you kiss a cookie run. Perspective my friend! Don’t beat yourself up. You’re a frogging miracle woman!

Good lord. Definitely ignore that BS. Not every mom needs to be stay at home and you forgetting doesn’t make you a bad mom, nor does store bought. Half the time kids prefer store bought because they don’t get those treats all the time. You’re doing your best and eff what that other person said.

Maybe you were feeling insecure about forgetting and misread her tone? Hey, you remembered when it counted and got it done. Store bought is just as good! If it makes you feel better, I forgot to wear my ugly sweater for the ugly sweater event and I don’t even have kids. 😆

I would have said “Yes I do - I’m a mom. I got my days mixed up and realized this morning was the holiday party. So I took 2 hours out of my work day to bring cookies. I know it’s last minute, but I wanted my son to know that I’m willing to drop work and show up for him.” That would shut her up.

Is there a partner in the picture? Are they carrying their weight?

Honestly, my mom may she rest in peace was a jobless alcoholic that would have rather sold her soul than volunteer at my school. And I’m a successful executive. So I’m not sure that stuff needs to be a priority unless YOU want it to be of course and it fills some quality of life or connection to your child. I just mean, in terms of is that what you should feel obligated to prioritize, maybe rachet it down a notch if it’s just too much?

And to heck with that other mom, but the answer to her question is YES I sure do! It sure is tough balancing a successful fulfilling career with the blessings of also having such a beautiful family, boy let me tell you, but I wouldn’t have it any other way! 😄

Go to whole foods and dump the cookies in a tupper ware. Done. But honestly, who cares what they say. “Yes that’s partially right. I have a few important jobs. I am a mom and I also make money to raise my son. Do you only have one important job?”

My son’s teacher - we never see you do pick up? Yes, that’s right. I work and my husband is stay at home. He does all the pick up. I do pickups when I can.