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Think they did a good job on this piece. It was a truly embarrassing moment for the firm, but I think it’s being handled as well as can be expected. Should go smoothly this year 🤞
https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/ap-exclusive-new-rules-govern-handling-of-oscar-envelopes/2018/01/22/7e1d5cf2-ff86-11e7-86b9-8908743c79dd_story.html
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Mentor
Hold your head up high. Don’t worry about how/what others think. Don’t fuel any fire. Pretend nothing happened and it’s no big deal. Because, guess what? It’s no big deal unless you make it so.
Amazing advice, thank you!
It's completely natural to feel emotional during a conversation with your boss, especially if it's a sensitive topic or something that's been weighing on you. Crying is a normal human response to strong emotions, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. It's also important to remember that everyone has moments like this, and people are generally understanding and empathetic.
While it's possible that other people in the cafeteria may have noticed you crying, it's also possible that they were focused on their own conversations and didn't even notice. Either way, it's not necessarily something that will impact your credibility or brand, especially if it's a one-time occurrence.
If you're feeling uncomfortable about the situation, you could consider talking to your boss about it and expressing your concerns. However, it's also important to remember that crying is a normal and healthy expression of emotion, and you shouldn't feel ashamed or embarrassed about it.
Tell people it was a conversation about cancer if the nosy give you poop.
Was the 1:1 just to talk about goals, objectives, how are you doing? I’m not a big fan when they take 1:1s in a public setting. Managers should realize people can put on a smile but doesn’t mean they are torn or broken inside.
I have cried a couple times in my career and it has not stopped my growth. Don’t give it another thought!
Mentor
We’re all human. It’s not a big deal to me. Being able to be yourself, unapologetically, is one of the bravest things you can do. If others have a problem with that then that’s on them, and is their issue. We can’t all just be concrete robots
Next time he asks I would just yes, Yep… every time I will, especially if it will make you go away. Or dude let it go. I was a real human for a second, it happens, get used to it.
Sending you a big virtual hug first. My friend, please do not, DO NOT give this a second thought. I say that as someone who often displays emotions this way and have shed many many tears (including too many occasions of “frugly” crying. Snotty and all). I used to worry about this perception thing too and then realised I simply can’t be who I’m not so now just don’t give it a second thought and totally embrace it. I think I’m known for being slightly “crazy” but overall, am told time and time again I am “authentic”. Really hadn’t done my career any harm 🤓
I think your manager is incredibly unprofessional for having a 1:1 in a communal space. 1:1s should be confidential and held in private. I would never do that to my team.
I think some people may judge you for it initially but unless you make a habit of it it will soon be old news. Try not to let it get to you too much. I can think of occasions that many of my colleagues have cried at work as have I. It is not something that has held me back and it is not something I think of when I consider my colleagues strengths and weaknesses.
As a side note speak to your manager and explain you'd like him to stop bringing it up. Be honest and explain that you feel it wasn't one of your finest moments and you'd much rather not be reminded of it. Any decent manager would apologise and refrain from doing it again.
It's braver to show emotion than stifle emotion. You only feel vulnerable because we live in a male dominated society where crying is seen as weakness. Crying is normal. Men cry. Boys cry. Girls cry. Women cry. A man finds it harder to cry in public because it's viewed as weakness which is what society has taught him to believe. He's trapped by societal standards. You're a goddess who doesn't see the world through his narrow lense. Let him tease you about crying. You had the balls to express your emotion. He couldn't and would never dare to show emotion. When he teases you, tease him back "oh are you going to cry?" Response: "depends on the stupidity levels of your questions" 😜 or just straight up tell him t was due to a hormone imbalance caused by a medical condition. And when he teases u again "I don't think it's wise to mock others about their medical conditions/history"
I am sorry that you had to experience this. There will be mixed feelings. The people following the old fashioned management style will be judgmental as they believe emotions in general are not acceptable in the work environment.
I like to think that the open minded people of any age and the new generations especially are more compassionate and understanding. You want to be surrounded by people who still have a heart regardless of where they work. If they judge you for this then you are not in the right place.
It happened to me at my current job and my manager was kind. Not entirely sure if he judged me as anything is possible but at least he didn’t show it.
I used to work in toxic environments where I was crying every week and had to hide in the toilet because they would never consider emotional people for promotions…
Showing your humanness is not a bad thing. If people see you as “less than” because you let your emotions show, I’d be worried about the environment you work in.
Don’t cry at work. And if you think you will, go to the restroom to let it out and pull yourself together afterwards. I know it’s old school but still very much a norm in this industry. I’m super emotional and I’ve had to do this in public accounting - your credibility will take a hit anytime tears are involved.
As a woman, I sympathize with you very much. I can understand the pressure that women bear in work and life, but I still hope that in the future work and life, you can have a stronger heart and better control your emotions , Let others see your strong and confident side.
Why is it stronger to hold in emotions instead of being honest? Isn't confidence about expressing ones true self, instead of hiding it to impress others.