Related Posts
More Posts
Consulting be like
Enthusiast
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
Sign Up to see all discussions
- Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
- Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
- Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
"" is an unusual email domain. If correct, please proceed to the next step
Messaging rates may apply
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Share
Embed this post
Copy and paste embed code on your site
Preview
Download the
Fishbowl app
Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile
Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl
Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl
Messaging rates may apply
It is disrespectful but many people don’t realize they do it, or how bad it is. It’s not limited to just guys, my stepmother does this when I’m speaking and it’s… a challenge. No advice, just solidarity. If it was my SO I’m not sure how I’d handle it to really see it change.
I lean towards the latter. It's an indication he's not a good listener and is more focused on whatever he wants to say instead of being considerate and making space for you in a conversation. Might not be at all personal, but I would try to have a conversation with him about communication and listening so it doesn't become a bigger issue later.
Pro
I mean this with kindness- is it possible you talk too much and the only way he can get a word in is to interrupt you? My BFF talks non-stop and if i want to get a word in, I have to interrupt her
Haha I see why you’d think that, but that’s actually not the case 😄 I’m not a non-stop talker and neither is he, it’s a good balance I’d say
I wouldn’t generalize anything to entire gender although men may feel more entitled to opinions over women. My boyfriend does that too but I attribute his behavior more to his inability to stay focused than being disrespectful. This observation is based on many factors and his history with childhood ADHD. It may be subconscious for your boyfriend. Hopefully you can work this out through communication. (Or you can do the same to him and annoy the hell out of him 😆
Haha that’s fantastic. As long as you can communicate, that’s the most important. You don’t change a long-standing behavior overnight.
You also find middle grounds. I plan everything and my boyfriend never plans. I used to hate it when he’s late to anything. Now if it’s his family party and he shows up hours late and use me as an excuse…I let it be. If he’s going to be late to our date, he now remembers to call first and acts like a sad puppy ‘cause I’ve been mad at him so so many times. 🤣
My husband does this. He got it from his mother. I feel your pain. It’s the rudest habit and they have no idea they’re doing it. Even after you call it out they still don’t realize they do it. It’s his real one huge awful habit that I cannot stand, but near-impossible to change.
I truly empathize.
Rising Star
My husband does this and it drives me crazy. He has definitely improved over time thanks to our amazing couples therapist. As long as he is willing to work on it and take it seriously I don’t think it’s an issue. The fact that he laughs it away would upset me and makes me think it might not improve without outside help.
BCG1 has a point, I’m more on the quiet side and often the only way to get a word in is to interject.
It’s also possible that he’s scatter brained/ADD. Either it’s hard to focus or whatever you’re talking about is pushing the limits of his attention span. I wouldn’t say I’m ADD, but people really try my patience when I have to listen to them talk incessantly on a topic.
Just highlighting that he may not intentionally trying to be rude. Have a conversation about it and also get a better understanding of his communication style.
Just saw this today on Instagram-maybe this would help? https://www.instagram.com/p/CQ1AcjFrIs_/?utm_medium=copy_link
That’s brilliant
Chief
I don’t care about the reason, intentional or not, whatever excuse anyone has.
It’s completely disrespectful of your partner so to tell him that, how he comes across when he interrupts basically says there is no value when you speak. If he continues to do it, I would not be with him.
On the other hand, be conscious of your speaking style, is there a way to improve? For example - are you overly detailed in every conversation? Do you ‘dump’ never ending stories on people? Do you monopolize conversations? Do you only talk about yourself? I have interrupted people that lack social awareness.
Chief
that’s why you should call him out and put more firm boundaries. He needs to demonstrate better awareness. I feel bad if he has any women that report to him, hard to grow under a leader like that
Rising Star
I have several people in my family who do this and it’s neglectful on their part. I used to get frustrated but my new strategy is: I get really quiet and unexpressive. I don’t acknowledge their point. I let them finish and make the silence uncomfortable so they ask what’s up and then I bring it to their attention that they interrupted me. It’s gotten much better.
Enthusiast
Are you me?
My boyfriend of 2 years does this too! He’s gotten slightly better over time, but he definitely still does it.
It annoys me to no end, and so I’ve learned to say, “let me finish, ...”
When I visited his family over the holidays I noticed his mom does it to his dad.
ADD. Too many thoughts to hear yours. I do notice men tune out. Women too but men tend to not be as expressive. Not to over generalize but my experience. Not sure of cause but solution is to stop talking until they start noticing. Why aren’t you talking? Well probably because you’re not listening. Do you want to try this again?
Came here to say this—ADD. It’s not that I interrupt my gf per se, sometimes sure but doesn’t everyone do that occasionally? ut I do change the topic (sometimes drastically) from what she’s saying and she thinks I wasn’t listening. But really my brain just is hop hop hoppin along and I change topic. Maybe see if he’s got the same problem or if it’s actually a rude problem that could be handled with coaching
I think that’s rude, but he also might not do it on purpose.
I have a BA on my team who does this all the time, also to our EM and sometimes leadership. She has a hard time realizing when it’s happening and I do believe that she doesn’t do it on purpose. Still find it sort of annoying and disrespectful…
Watch/ listen to see who else he does this with. Does he interrupt his male friends with non-topical thoughts? What about other women? His dad? Mother? Co-workers? Might give you insight into where this habit stems from.
My boyfriend used to do this the first 1-2 months we were together (now at 1.5 years). I pointed it out to him ONCE, he apologized, admitted he didn’t realize and he never did it again. Action speaks louder than words, esp when it comes to bring respectful.
Are you rambling?
No, I actually listen more than I talk and let others speak before I do
Adhd and/or culture. (Does he come from a family where mom n dad talk in parallel?). Keep calling him out on it, he will eventually become aware.