Need help 🐠
GF in med school at tier 3 city, I’m currently in tier 1 city, I got my MBB dream offer in another tier 1 city across the US.

Dating 4 years, 2 in college, 2 post grad. CONT

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Long distance isn’t hard when you’re a consultant. I live with my husband and we’re basically in a LDR since we see each other on the weekends. You can easily alt travel to her “tier 3” city on the weekends.

likeupliftingsmart

My two cents is this. Your biggest relationship decision here is not MBB vs Accenture, its consulting vs low travel job. Your future wife will have a low/no travel job and a stable, family friendly career (assuming she’s not going to be a emergency room surgeon or something crazy). That right there is an amazing set up. You’re obviously talented enough to land a satisfying, well paying job that keeps you both at home 6 nights out of seven. Maybe you don’t “chase your dream” of being an MBB partner. Well, I’ve been that. It doesn’t make you happy. In fact, happiness isn’t really even the goal. The goal is doing something meaningful with your life. Can MBB partner be that? It can? But so can a thousand other futures you might have. Meaning comes from faith, family, friends and earned success in a career (I’m channeling Arthur Brooks and Jordan Peterson, shamelessly, if you didn’t already realize). Listen, if she’s the one, go to her and never let her go. You have a chance at deep meaning and potentially even happiness if she is, and you choose a satisfying life of a loving close family.

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P1 has the right perspective on life. It’s more than a career.

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I was in your shoes once upon a time. The lady and I were on opposite coasts. It worked out because she really was too busy with her studies and rotations that the distance gave both of us room to breathe and get our futures built up. Key is finding ways to communicate regularly and leverage your consulting career as traveling to visit her much easier. She will also have electives starting in 3rd year where she can come to you for a few weeks here and there. Residency will be the biggest unknown but they tend to take into account where the doctor's partner is located.

helpfullike

Do i try to transfer to her tier 3 city and cement what may be a lasting relationship for life? Or give it up and follow my career across the US to work with MBB?

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Mbb

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I’m going from NYC to SF, and she’s in Florida. Not exactly the easiest flex trip

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And try to keep it up for 3 years?

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I’m saying don’t let your entire career aspirations depend on her. Whether you’re located in the same city as her not at your dream job or elsewhere in your dream job, you’re generally not going to see her during the week anyway. It’ll be long distance-ish regardless and it’s really a degree of how long distance. If it was going to work out regardless, how long distance doesn’t matter.

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Why can’t you take it for a year or so and then transfer to a Florida office?

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You don’t know where your client is gonna be. Anywhere halfway across the US and just head the other way halfway across the US

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OP: Where in Florida? That could make a huge difference too

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Honestly, the relationship will work out regardless of the distance. Or it won’t. But don’t put your life on hold and expect it to go all gravy. Either way you’d be holding your fate over her head and that may cause some resentment as well.

Just do what YOU want.

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Damn everyone putting MBB on a pedestal over true love.... OP can you transfer offices after a year at MBB?

smart

Do MBB don't be weak. If it's meant to work out it will work out.

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5 years down the road, what would you regret more? Regret you lost her and youll never get her back? Or regret you lost a “dream job” and will never get it back? I understand you can reapply and get the jov back but no the experience you wouldve had for those 5. Good luck op! A major crossroad for sure

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Take MBB, flex to Florida, fly her out a few times or meet in a city halfway, then transfer to Miami office.

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I think a key piece that’s missing here is what your girlfriend thinks as well. If I were her, I would feel pretty guilty about the fact that you’re giving up your dream job just because of our relationship. As a partner and a true girlfriend, I would want to support you and allow you to follow your dreams while also allowing myself to follow mine. At the end of the day, if we can both respect that and also understand that we will need to put in more effort to make the relationship work, I would rather try that than feel guilty for making you change your dreams for me.

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Take the MBB job, try it for a year and then reevaluate. By that time you understand more of what MBB offers career wise and you and your SO will know how the long distance will/won’t affect your relationship.

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1st :(

Agree with PWC1

Tough. Typically firms will let you do whatever you want after a year, so you could transfer or unofficially live there. The kicker though is "Tier 3" probably has to connect for flights, which would be very annoying to you and project teams. She'll be so busy she probably won't even notice you're gone, but schedules will probably be too hectic to alt-travel. I'd probably look for a cool job in her city if you see her as (probably) being the one. Which city, BTW?

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